Right this moment?

My main regular doctor, who I slowly built a rapport and trust with over years and years, was intentionally infected with Delta by a patient who didn't believe in masks or vaccines. She survived but became disabled and left. I didn't get to say goodbye and she didn't get a chance to help hand off my care.

My new doctor that was assigned me to hates me.

She's straight up is completely uninterested in my care and is being an ableist gatekeeper of my meds. I've been on the same meds successfully for years and years and she is making me jump through hoops, not filling part of it, and she WITHOUT TALKING TO ME ordered a urine drug test.

I'm a rule follower and people pleaser and this was so fucking insulting. I haven't done it and she still hasn't said said anything. I'm going to ignore it until she talks to me but I'm also not confrontational.

I have so many health problems I can't even talk about with my doctor because she doesn't want to hear them. All she cares about is my meds and whether or not I'm a liability to her.

It's my worst nightmare because I had addict parents and have never done drugs and really don't drink. I'm very sensitive about being treated like I'm like them. She treats me poorly because she doesn't know me and doesn't trust me. I also suspect she's burned out.

The worst part is she's my roommate's doctor too and she's all smiles and nice, caring, and empathetic with my roommate (so they say).

I don't know what I did to make her hate me because she was hostile from the jump when I tried to introduce myself and my conditions.

I just had an appointment and I'm really upset and feel hopeless. I can't switch doctors or they will label me as doctor shopping and drug seeking.

Don't need advice, I'm not going to stand up for myself. I'm just answering the prompt.