323
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2023
323 points (97.1% liked)
Asklemmy
43941 readers
546 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- !lemmy411@lemmy.ca: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
I've worked through that stuff a bunch with my therapist. I do unfortunately have a lot work and family related stress that I can't avoid. Which is why I'm always trying to figure out how not to things bother me. I've been setting firmer boundaries at work, but can't exactly do that with family, but if I could somehow not let things bother me I'd be better. For example, my 12 year old is autistic, and will do things like walk up to me and say, "no TV!". To whichy response is always, "that is not how we ask for things". Then he will ask, "dad, can I watch TV?".This has been going on for years, so it immediately gets on my nerves because I know he knows how to ask properly. But I also know I shouldn't really care that much.
For me there’s a number of other coping mechanisms, like the usual breath work to try to be more meditative and objective about something, but often I employ the “at least it’s not” approach to bridge the gaps and minimize it in comparison to something worse. It’s often possible to invent a silver lining.
Such as taking a moment to think “as least it’s not shit” when the dog tracks in mud, or “at least he isn’t physically pounding the TV when he wants to watch it.” Just anything that I would rather not be dealing with more than the current thing.
It’s an aggravating world and reality. Now more than ever. Figuring out how to not be aggravated by it constantly is a lifelong challenge. I’m still working on it.