Russia was very explicit in its intent of breaking that Memorandum, it does not change the fact that promising NATO was dangerous and stupid. And it was also cynical because NATO membership was impossible so long as the conflict in the Donbas was ongoing, effectively forcing Russia to never back down there.

Nobody is forcing Russia to never back down. For start they could have respected the memorandum and let Ukraine decide what to do as sovereign nation. Nobody forced Russia to invade the Donbas at the time, only their fear that NATO would do who know what. Or the fact that Putin need external enemies to blame for everything bad in Russia

I’m not saying the Russian government are the good guys or the Western governments are the bad guys, I am saying that big states with big armies have interests and the will to use violence to attain those interests, this is how the world works and we should act accordingly. So if a nuclear power says it is willing to go to war over an alliance membership, it should be taken serious and a peaceful solution should be sought.

Oh yes, that will go well. Following your reasoning, to end the war in Ukraine we just need that NATO declare that it is willing to use nuclear weapons over Ukraine joining the alliance. Damn, call the NATO HQ and propose it, the war will be over by the weekend.

While I am all in for a peaceful solution I am also aware that to have peace you need to have both sides to want it, otherwise after a "give me this or else" there will be a "give me that or else". So if Russia says it is willing to go to war, the answer should be "let's talk about this and solve peacefully, but keep in mind that if we really go to war over this, we will stand and both of us will be fucked up".
Then I don't know how you can make a peace deal with a nation who already demonstrated to be willing to ignore the deal it sign if it is conventient to them. (not that they are the only ones to be honest)

Right now I am in favour of a cease fire, this does not mean the occupied territories become Russian, it just means the fighting stops.

And then ? What make you think that a) Russia respect it and b) Russia would concede something ?

On your last question: I don’t have a country, I am a citizen. And if the government (foreign or native) treats me bad enough I might be willing to resist them. But I sure as hell would not want to be conscripted (by any government) to be send into the meat grinder.

Don't play games, you know exactly what I am asking and the fact that you try so hard to avoid to give a clear answer tell me much more about you than any answer you can give.

And if you think differently (and wouldn’t mind a night of bad sleep) I invite you to read up on the fait of Ukrainian conscripts; there is a reason Ukraine has trouble finding new recruits, a very good reason.

Which leads to the question: since the enemy is brutal we must just concede everything it want ?

And btw, I had read and listen to much worst stories.