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What does femininity mean to you? (lemmy.blahaj.zone)
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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Over the years, I've seen many folk talking about their relationship with femininity and how it relates to their transition and to their sense of identity, of who they are.

I've never understood it though. I don't feel like I have a relationship with femininity, or at least, nothing beyond pragmatic necessity. It doesn't relate to my sense of identity or who I am. In many ways, it feels like an obligation, rather than a source of empowerment or self understanding.

So, I'm curious how it works for other folk who find empowerment in it. What does it mean to you? How did it help you find yourself? How do you relate to femininity now vs earlier in your life?

Edit - To add some context. I'm 7 years transitioned, and "post transition" for want of a better term. I'm quite comfortable with my own relationship (or lack of it) with femininity. This is more an exercise in trying to understand different perspectives :)

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[-] LainTrain@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

I think older trans women (as in those who transitioned over 40 and over rather than those who transitioned in teens/20s and got old later) had to deal with the brunt of completely untreated and possibly completely misunderstood/unknown dysphoria for a lot longer, they likely have a pretty complex relationship to it that forms a large part of their identity, especially through any and all coping mechanisms (maybe wanting long hair, cross dressing, etc.) and the shame and possibly social punishment that comes with that, especially in their babytrans phase.

For me it's meh, I don't even remember any other way anymore and I'm a pretty late transitioner by today's standards in my late teens, I don't really understand gender, feminine things used to freak me out as a kid, I primarily experience sex dysphoria, I present andro most days.

[-] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 7 months ago

I think older trans women (as in those who transitioned over 40

That's me! :)

this post was submitted on 11 Mar 2024
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