1230
there's a reason it's "hard out there" you know (OC)
(lemmy.dbzer0.com)
This comment section: "Actually I'm pretty sure the bike fell over for reasons unrelated to the stick"
Had an older co-worker who kept saying that Andrew Tate had some real gems and that he was just telling young men to give up videogames and hit the gym if they wanted some self worth.
So one day I looked him dead in the eye and gave him my best impersonation of a 1950's radio voice and said. " Young ladies if you don't work on refining and improving your womanly figure with clean living and labourous exercise and not stop wasting your time reading novels then how will you ever expect to catch a husband?!"
I would like to say that I scored a point but he just sputtered and went on being horrible.
Andrew Tate is the absolute worst, but it is also a fact - one that has been true for all of recorded history - that competing with each other for female attention is a generally popular male motivation. And when a guy doesn't do those things, he can expect mockery. Do you have anything nice to say about neckbeards? No? Didn't think so.
Yeah, men policing other men's commitment to masculinity, by mocking and putting others down and being violent, is an almost universal thing.
And also a disease. And it shouldn't exist.
(I'm not implying you're saying it should. I'm just stating it shouldn't)
I remember at my first job we had a party. I played with the 10 years old daughter of the boss. Some guy was telling boring and exaggerated stories from his military service. Another guy told me i'am not particularly manly for drawing something with the little girl instead of listening to whatever.
Still makes me chuckle that his understanding of masculinity revolves around pointless affirmative rituals than providing for your family and community.
Neckbeards are some of the best Dungeon Masters and I ain't lying
They're also some of the best FOSS developers. But neither of those things are what most people (men and women) consider attractive
I wondered why some of these men say these nonsensical and mysoginistic things despite being popular and pretty good looking. Were they not taught to respect women? Then there is the answer: they weren't. It dawned on me that not everyone were taught the same as I was-- to not give in to insecurities and that you don't have to prove anything to anyone. Of course, it's recommended to improve one's self, but if the end goal is transactional and expect reward rather than doing things because it's the right thing, then boy you will just lead yourself to a downward spiral of disappointment and cynicism. I've seen this on a few people close to me trying to prove themselves to anyone who don't necessarily care about them. I have a mate to bought an expensive but ugly pair of Gucci shoes to impress a rich girl who strings him along, rather than court someone who will accept him for who he is. We're trying to impress people we don't like and don't like us, instead of building meaningful relationship with people who will accept you.
You're being mocked for not conforming to masculine stereotype? Fuck them. If they are truly your friends, they should accept you for who you are. Find a new group of people who are like-minded and open minded.
I mean the premise is flawed. The "neckbeards" are not intrinsically unlovable but they are getting duped into being annoying and problematic to people.
When you treat the attention of any kind of people as a status symbol or a commodity to use for bragging rights or prestige for others it's not exactly fair to the people whom you are essentially using. You see the same principle with famous people. Being in any kind of relationship with someone, even friends, soley because you like what their association does for your image is a jerk thing to do
The people who do the mocking are every bit at fault for being assholes. Only when the person being mocked accepts the assholes premise as true and care about their acceptance do they also become an asshole in turn.
Yeah, this is the obvious "if you want people to like you then all you gotta do is be nice to them" issue that people keep failing to understand.
I'm a dick, why does nobody love meeee??
It's more complicated than that I think.
Like "being nice to people" is transactional. It doesn't really look at emotional needs. The so called neckbeards think they are being nice... But the issue is that nice is superficial. Nice will get you promotions at your customer service job but it ignores emotional need.
The fact so a contingent is so poisoned by so called "benevolent" sexism is a feature not a bug.
Be nice to people because you just try to be a nice person, not because you expect something back. It will pay off.
If you're an Intel type, then how about you go for nice, you start practicing some sports to get healthier, do less internet, practice mental higiene by not looking at opinion pieces too much anymore, go out, mingle, talk with people. Get hobbies, get a life. Start dating, don't go for "I only date tens!" Nonsense. Those are things that will make your life better.
I can’t think of anything nice to say about neckbeards but I can say some lovely things about some guys I know who spend more time playing games than working out
I was playing a copy of an N64 Star Wars game with my friend's daughter. She'd never seen an N64 game before and said "Wow! It's Star Wars Minecraft!"
That moment made my day, I'm never giving up video games.
You're being downvoted for pointing out human nature. You're not wrong, we compete for females. We're animals, even if people want to lie and claim we've progressed. We have not.
So i take it if you fancy a new "female" you kill her previous partner in a fight and then her children with that partner, so she will focuse her attention on the children you make with her. If necessary by raping her? Also if there is no nee females available you will rape and make new children with your own daughters?
Because that is what animals do.
Are you trying to use this argument to deny evolution or evolutionary instinct? Cuz your attempted argument makes no sense. Trying to claim humans aren't driven to procreate is simply contrary to all available information.
Are you not understanding that social and cultural evolution is part of evolution and that there might be good reason why not murdering and rapeing each other like animals do, is an evolutionary advantage?
Social evolution is a wonderful thing, it's not stronger than your biological imperative though. Maybe one day, but that days not today. The guy is still going to chase the virile woman and the woman is still going to seek comfort and safety.
One of the best things taught to me growing up is that you don't have to prove yourself to anyone. There are shallow people, but why waste time with them? Why not go with people who are more open-minded, have good control to not give into superficial and shallow biological instincts, and will accept you for who you are?
Yes, we're all taught that. Our evolutionary instinct is stronger than your teachings, more often than not.
Open minded people open their legs too. That's just reality.
Murder and rape is also natural but not everyone does it and we frown upon it. We have laws against it.
Giving in to instincts that are not productive is showing weakness.
Ya, we live in a society and we should place restrictions around our innate nature, we've learned about the perils of not doing so.
That doesn't in anyway mean it's not our nature. It's weird people are offended by this reality.
We don't go on physical fights to win over a women. It's destructive. How difficult is it to understand? We don't act on destructive instincts because it's not productive and, well, destructive.
I always say this to others, but you must be with running with a bad crowd to hold such warped view.
Are you crazy? You ever been to a bar on a weekend?!
There's constantly fights over women. It's definitely not productive but it's absolutely reality. WTF world do you live in?
And you emulate those knuckledraggers and think everyone else is like them? Like many others I have spoken to who say similar things, it proves my point that you run with a bad crowd leading your warped view.
If you say you have been taught the same thing as I have, you will know when to leave and avoid a toxic environment.
LMFAO. That you are calling the vast majority of humanity knuckle draggers just demonstrates your ignorance of your own biology.
You can believe you're different but the reality is you're not special. You're human, your biological imperative is present just like it is in just about every living thing on this planet. I read with a bad crowd? I'll tell that to my friends at the drag show fundraiser I'll be at later today. I'll bring it up at my next meeting with the queer housing co-op that I'm helping get off the ground. Some people think the crowd I run with is bad but I think they're cool people.
This is the level of stupid I expect from homeschooled anti-evolutionists. But you do you and you keep thinking you're not a human being. Lmfao.
ETA. Now that you have me thinking about it, something between 1/3-1/2 of the people we're trying to home, have children so it's not like the non hetero community doesn't also have the same biological imperative.
Yeah you're just trolling at this point.
If you think that, you're as intellectually dishonest as you are mentally deficient.
Haha, if you're serious about what you say, I wish you the best of luck on your journey.
Bullshit. This queer begs to fucking differ.
Well ya, you're a freak of nature by literal definition, of course you wouldn't agree. Humans, like all animals have a drive to reproduce. You don't have that drive, you're not relevant.
You're going to interpret this literal fact as homophobia too which is kinda funny if you knew me LoL.
Homosexuality has been observed in species including birds, fish, insects, and over 1500 species of mammals.
Blowjobs don't make babies, and homophobia is only observed in one species. Who's a freak of nature now? Checkmate heteros!
Ok? What's your point? Are you trying to use homosexuality as an argument against the imperative to procreate?
WTF is wrong with you? You should listen to some blood hound gang this evening LMFAO.
"Nature" doesn't have any rigid set of rules that push us to be anything specific, in fact it's very much the opposite resulting in evolution and adaptation that is constantly interfering with the traits getting passed down. Sure we have biological mechanisms resulting from this that will reward us for things that tend to increase the population over time, because individuals that didn't were unlikely to reproduce, but even those aren't consistent from individual to individual, and are regularly suppressed and regulated in response to changing environments as would be seen in nature. Nature is constantly and relentlessly progressing, it's just slow on a human timescale.
Science and nature are not forcing you or anyone to be misogynistic, that's just the excuse many have decided to use so they don't have to confront themselves or the complicated societal issues behind it.
Nature has one general rule....procreate.
That's why you're here. Me too.