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this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2023
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Don't rely on Silicon Valley to babysit your child. All software has flaws, and a kid who wants to watch more YouTube videos will figure out a way because there's probably a dozen videos out there detailing each bug.
V-Chips didn't do shit in my era, and we found ways around Bess, so none of this surprises me.
Do you have kids? I can tell you as a parent that parental controls are godsend.
If I were to try to do the same myself, it would be 10-15 arguments a day. When the software does it, there is no argument or very little. Sometimes they ask for more, and I can evaluate their case. Much better than chasing them around trying to tear the iPad out of their hands.
All that being said, I've had to use other 3rd party software because Apple's parental controls are buggy and unreliable.
My 5 year old is already sneaky enough that when I put him on starfall he will wait for me to get distracted and chnage tabs and type gibberish into search, or click the YouTube icon in chrome and do the same (which is more dangerous, YouTube has some really weird shit if you search special characters).
I alsready have dns controls on network etc and generally manage access by physically retaining control of a device. M
But as they get older adding some level of content filter that’s https aware may be needed.
Though as an IT admin I’ll try and rely on trust and communication over technology solutions. But still. Like borderline planning to dump them on their own vlan, with a Pi-hole and some extra filters, that also goes to Cisco umbrella and some sort of squid guard/sensei setup on my opnsense router or even websense or palo alto filter.
We use a combo of ScreenTime and eero’s parental filters to cut off internet access (what they mostly want to do anyway). Though, we’re looking to migrate the eero subscription to a Firewalla and get more features without a sub in the next year.
Yeah. I have been looking at cell providers parental controls. Wife and Inhave been on pay as you cell service for a long time but they generally have nothing. But ultimately anything I do on wifi we gotta apply to cell service at some point. So something like Sensei or zenarmor only goes so far. It’s fine to start for sure thiugh
May just go screentime and sensei and maybe an mdm when they get old enough. Definately don’t want those apps that snoop on text messages etc. I want to repeat their privacy and if it comes to needing to look at that I’ll physically take the phone or restore a backup.
Keep trying, you will figure it out. Obviously you need to physically monitor as well as use tools. But my teenager finally gave up trying after I thwarted numerous attempts at circumventing the limit.
I mean. I’m a admin by trade. Ran systems for a bank that had multiple cascading products.
It’s more philosophical choice. I can easily setup blockades they would be hard pressed to thwart even as a teen.
Part of me wants to challenge them like I was to bypass them. Part of me wants to teach them to be responsible and practice good secuirty on the net
I feel exactly the same.
Can confirm “the limit is the limit” 🤷♂️ works WAY better than “because I said so.”
It definitely does. Don't use Apple products, but setting limits or bedtime alarms (on the switch) helps us all out. It cut down on the tantrums about stopping, it gives them the routine they need (we're all on the ADHD spectrum in this house), and I set it up and it's done (I have practically nil executive function).
Is it perfect? No. But it works for us.
Software can be very helpful for all sorts of situations. However, that doesn’t mean you get to abdicate all responsibility.
The person you are responding to is simply noting that kids are not stupid and often find ways to get around parental controls. There are also ways for content to get around controls while complying with controls. It’s unfortunate Apple’s software is buggy, it should be better.
Kids will definitely try to get around it. I'd be disappointed if they didn't. It is a bit of an arms race, but having spent 30 years in IT, I'm up to the task. My only point is that using the tools at your disposal doesn't make you a bad parent. Arguing with your kids every 10 minutes doesn't make you a good one either.
No one said using tools available makes someone a bad parent. They said only blindly using these tools without doing more makes a bad parent.
No idea how arguing with your kids every 10 minutes came up. Has nothing to do with anything anyone is saying so I’m assuming that is coming from a personal place. Perhaps you’ve over invested in tooling at the sake of healthy, non-confrontational conversation, I don’t know. No one brought this aspect up, but you.
Constantly arguing with your kids is the method being used if you don't use parental controls. Especially as they get older and actually need technology to do their school work and to be contactable when they are out and about. I've tried it, and it's not very effective at all.
What if I told you lots of people can figure out how to educate their kids without arguing? Don’t get me wrong, kids and teenagers love to argue. However, not all of us use “constantly arguing with our kids” as a parenting method. Some of us have patience and learn to talk to our kids before using a tool to try to force the situation. I could go on, but you’re allowed to be the parent you want to be.
I know it's possible. I'd just prefer to spend my energy on higher value discussions than constantly harping on about screen time.
You are entitled to that preference.
How can the kid watch videos on how to watch more videos when they are blocked from watching videos?
"Hmm.... I wonder if Mom's password to unlock the iPad is the same as her pin code for..... holy shit is she really this stupid!?"
Or if that's not enough, here's my lazy attempt to see what the options are: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZaMNsGSvRE
Imagine if I put more than 10 seconds of thought into this.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/watch?v=eZaMNsGSvRE
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I'm open-source, check me out at GitHub.
Good bot!
You probably don’t have kids so you don’t understand how valuable parental controls are. /s
There are a few parents in this thread showing their ignorance.
My kid doesnt have a smartphone. But he has access to our family pc, for gaming and music.
But no video. I blocked the browser and youtube completely
The alternative solution is to not give your kid a phone at all. Having been down the cat and mouse games with blocking, I can tell you that’s the only thing that works. The problem is that most schools require technology use, paper maps and public phones are non-existent, social pressure, etc. Pinwheel is the most nerfed smartphone for parents who want to limit their kids phone use but it’s a weird subset of Android, doesn’t nicely fit into Apple ecosystems, but effective if you need that.