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this post was submitted on 12 Jun 2024
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so "I/me/mine", right? :*P
Hah, got me there on a technicality.
An example though would be one friend I have who was telling me recently about a story from back when we were in high school. When quoting someone who was talking about her, she chose to use her current pronouns and current name even though realistically those wouldn't have been used at that time. Even if it's less "accurate" in a historical context, it's a positive affirmation to be able to say "this is who I have always been, even if I couldn't share it publicly at the time."
And it also helps those in the present who may have never known her back then and might wonder who she was referring to. A bit like how one might talk about the childhood of Lady Gaga and not the childhood of Stefani Germanotta.
Also in the case you described when she talks to someone who didn't know her pre-transition it would be a forced outing using the old pronouns and deadname.
I did get the point, just felt like you walked right into that one ;) As for pronouns, I believe each person is different & one should ask them before assuming - but I also think "misgendering" someone in past tense regarding a time before their transition, before being informed about their preferences, shouldn't be met with the same disdain as the "vanilla misgendering". In general none of us should be getting our panties in a wrinkle over other people's way of addressing us unless there's malicious intent (and even then, getting angry about it is just going to ruin our own day, chances are not theirs if they are that inconsiderate.