Don’t ask the internet this. Talk to a real doctor.
My wife had a mental health crisis last year where she could pretty much only scream and cry. For about 6 months, her life was only screaming and crying. She couldn't sleep. She couldn't eat. I mean, she ate, but it often involved gagging and forcing food down. At her worst, she went three whole days without sleep. We took her to the ER, and they basically just gave her Xanax and anti nausea medication to help her eat, then sent her home. Xanax helped in the moment but made everything 10x worse in the long run.
After several months, we finally got an appointment with a psychiatrist and started trying different medications. It was a long and painful process to find the right one, and we had to change psychiatrists once because of laws in our area preventing online psychiatrists from prescribing certain medications. But we eventually found a psychiatrist and combination of medications that works for her. It took a few months of being on it for it to really start helping. But she's doing very well. She started working again recently. She can run errands on her own. She can be left at home by herself.
My answer is: see a psychiatrist.
Idk if this is the right fit for your question but, i used to be excessively anxious all the time and it definitely made me feel kinda nutty and it made relationships with others very difficult for them.
Eventually I went on meds and it helped a tonnn, from there I just had to learn how to exist well without excessive anxiety all the time
Losing that constant voice that everything is about to come crashing down is hard. For one thing, you think about how much time you wasted not doing things because they might not work out.
Glad you are doing well.
Rough time in my life, pushed to breaking point, trauma, etc. Normal sensory processing disorder and highly active imagination got pushed next level. Felt I was starting to hallucinate, visions became intense, maybe someone from another dimension was trying to communicate with me, and they had to break my mind, make me go insane, to make it happen?
Anyhow, late one day, standing in a park, beneath a tree, sunset. Close eyes, sensation shattering, suspended, sunlight thru closed eyelids was amniotic glow.
Moment of fear, was I truly going insane? Thought about this. The reality I found myself in was actually quite pleasant, relaxing. I'd be OK with that.
That eventually led to not living in fear of possible insanity. Being ruled by fear is pointless longterm. Better to face, accept, after which, it can sometimes be enjoyable.
Seroquel—and even then I still feel crazy a lot of the time.
Sometimes when I have nothing to do I just destroy my own life. I get bored and burn bridges for almost no reason. I don't know why but when I'm working towards something or focusing on achieving a goal I don't do or even think about doing this.
I don't know if this is at all relevant to your question but it's something.
Maybe you are distracting yourself from something?
I occasionally do this too. For me it's when my internal voice starts turning to the "dark side" and ruminating on stupid shit, I start feeling overwhelmed etc etc.
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