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submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net to c/politicalmemes@lemmy.world

"Drinking a milkshake with a straw? Only a squishy lib would do such a thing."

More about Strawgate: https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2024/09/05/tim-walz-milkshake-masculinity-jesse-watters-straw-fox-news/75089097007/

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[-] VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works 1 points 6 days ago

Then why did they cry so much about plastic straws going away?

[-] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 79 points 1 week ago

I had the read the article before it was clear this was satire because the line between that and reality doesn’t seem to exist anymore.

[-] Omegamanthethird@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

The little addition below the title made it clear it was satire. But unfortunately the title could have gone either way.

[-] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I'm a alpha omega man level 2 super Saiyan get to my level.

[-] sir_pronoun@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

Thank you, I came to the comments just to have that cleared up.. Jfc

[-] RattlerSix@lemmy.world 57 points 1 week ago

Alpha males don't drink a milkshake with a straw, they give it their whole mouth, open up their throat and don't forget to work the balls.

[-] baggins@lemmy.ca 17 points 1 week ago

Real men boof their milkshakes

[-] EleventhHour@lemmy.world 34 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

And then cry about it while retelling the story to Kamala Harris at a Senate confirmation hearing…

Yeah, you forgot, but Kamala Harris made Brett Kavanaugh cry about drinking beer in his ass, lol

edit: the goodness

[-] modifier@lemmy.ca 8 points 1 week ago

I'm sure he hasn't forgotten.

[-] EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

How did I never hear about this‽

[-] telllos@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

This also the way they drink bubble tea, poke an opening, then work the hole with their tongue to get the pearls out.

[-] AgaveInMyAss@lemmy.world 50 points 1 week ago

Would you say they're grasping at straws now?

[-] weegee90@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago

Two straws in fact. At about face level in what one might call a jerking motion....

[-] Ioughttamow@fedia.io 13 points 1 week ago

I could take all this wokeness up to here, but this was the straw that broke the camel’s back

[-] BossDj@lemm.ee 7 points 1 week ago

The whole thing is a straw man supported by the spoon lobby

[-] Deadeyegai@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Weird, right?

[-] Brunbrun6766@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago

Don't bring death metal into this. Those bros are more likely listening to pop country

[-] BuckWylde@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago

They probably also think that Five Finger Death Punch is death metal.

[-] BossDj@lemm.ee 5 points 1 week ago

No, it's accurate. They role play being hardcore when they're at the gym. It's when they get back in their truck their fantasy self image role play turns to good ol boy when the pop country comes on. Or sometimes 90's country because, in their mind, all country after that is part of that change they hate so much.

Then when they get home, they role play being a big leader man all in charge as they boss around their little children and make them say "yes sir"

[-] z500@startrek.website 25 points 1 week ago

Milk comes from female animals. Real men drink bull semen shakes.

[-] theunknownmuncher@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

They've got nothing on this guy!! They're literally grasping at straws

[-] fubbernuckin@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

I'm guessing this is satire judging by the line "If the massive sugar rush causes your pancreas to explode, all the better. Real men enjoy exploding organs."

[-] RattlerSix@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

The article is satire about Jesse Waters' real criticism of Walz using a straw

[-] XTL@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 week ago

Ahh, Yes concerts were so great.

[-] dwemthy@lemdro.id 10 points 1 week ago

Dumping a bucket of ice cream on my face with some loud music playing sounds fun tbh

[-] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

And don't forget to fire your AR-15 in the air while doing it.

[-] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Well, shit, my water bottle for the gym has a lid with a straw attached to it.

[-] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 6 points 1 week ago

Check your genitalia because conservatives have labeled you.

[-] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

I've definitely seen some of the bigger dudes with the same type of bottle. Who wants to tell them?

[-] BaldManGoomba@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Might want your balls checked if it is a plastic water bottle or straw? Switch to metal and or silicone for less microplastics maybe...

[-] Leviathan@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Hey, leave Death Metal alone. The tough guys are in the Deathcore scene dancing in their hardcore pits.

[-] kahdbrixk@feddit.org 1 points 1 week ago

Aren't all the tough guys more like in the pits of gatekeeping hell, regardless of subgenre?

[-] Leviathan@lemmy.world 1 points 1 week ago

Honestly the gatekeepers are more the super basementy neckbeards.

[-] Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

I get my role model queues from Fox news. My medical advice? From a game of operation.

[-] affiliate@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

where do you get your fashion advice

[-] Balthazar@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

What, he hasn't ever worn a tan suit?

If this is the best they can dig up against him, he must be a pretty awesome guy!

[-] ohellidk@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 week ago

Real men drink poison!

[-] socsa@piefed.social 1 points 1 week ago

When did USA Today become so based?

this post was submitted on 07 Sep 2024
300 points (98.7% liked)

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