this post was submitted on 12 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] peregrin5@lemm.ee 31 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

The advice is usually pretty common sense and likely nothing you haven't heard before. The main benefit is having a safe space you can discuss your anxieties with a professional and having someone who will listen with minimal judgement. Also sometimes you need to be reminded of common sense when you lose sight of it.

Basically it's a paid friendship without all the other benefits of friendship.

Honestly I wouldn't be going if it weren't fully covered by my husband's insurance.

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[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 8 points 2 days ago

Get a hobby, get outside. Doesn't have to cost much either.

Sometimes in the summer I go to the beach before work and cook my breakfast there on a camping stove burning driftwood as fuel.

[–] whotookkarl@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago

Right, kick ass. Well, don't want to sound like a dick or nothin', but, ah... it says on your chart that you're fucked up.

[–] it_is_what_it_is@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago (2 children)

May be kinda specific (and poorly worded), but basically she said that negative feelings come from places where my mental image of the world conflicts with objective reality. This was mostly related to my relationship with my father, as i was looking up to him and seeking his approval, while ignoring the fact that neither he should be a role model or i can be a person whom he would accept. I found this advice applicable to many other situations, but unfortunately i mostly use it after the fact — i get disappointed or angry about something and then i ask myself "Ok, but what i imagined things would be? What else am i wrong about?"

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[–] vga@sopuli.xyz 10 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

"Here, take this quick test".

Ok.

"Huh. I've never seen results like this. "

...

"Welp, our time's up."

[–] Enzy@lemm.ee 7 points 2 days ago
[–] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

A friend of mine thinks we're due for a revolution, but isn't going to start anything unilaterally. Does that constitute "a danger to himself or others"?

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[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Your misery cannot possibly be the result a structurally oppressive society, look at how well I'm doing. Now go kick your mom in the vagina and suck dick for therapy fares, and come back next week.

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[–] Mallspice@lemm.ee 16 points 3 days ago (3 children)

If you’ve chosen to take in the weight of the world, no amount of therapy can solve your problems.

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[–] cabron_offsets@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Hot take, but I’ve done therapy with like 4-5 different therapists over like 20 years and found it to be of little to no use. What’s been a lot more helpful is just living life with the intent of letting go of past wrongs and making sure that I don’t inflict them on others.

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[–] Fleur_@aussie.zone 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)
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[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Mine explained my emotional dysregulation patterns and helped me identify the triggers and how to address them.

By far, the most useful technique they shared with me was the TIPP skills technique, which helps me come down when I am having strong emotional reactions as a trauma response or from anxiety. Essentially:

  • temperature - use cold temp to lower heart rate, warm to raise it
  • intense exercise - helps manage overwhelming energy levels
  • paced breathing - I'm not big on breathing but it works for some
  • paired muscle relaxation - my favourite as it also interrupts thought patterns

Hope you're able to access help though, obviously it is much better when personalized and you also get the safe space to release your fears and anxieties

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[–] H4rdStyl3z@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Find a job as soon as possible so you can make yourself useful and you'll feel better.

At this point I'm fully convinced therapy is about making you a cog in the machine of capitalism and not about making you feel better and more realized as a person.

[–] cattywampas@lemm.ee 24 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Having a job and feeling useful is in no way exclusive to capitalism.

[–] H4rdStyl3z@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 days ago

Sure, but reducing a person's purpose to that (and their issues to a lack of it) is.

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[–] endeavor@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] unit327@lemmy.zip 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

but doctor, i am pagliacci

[–] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I got a lot of professional advice and guidance in the moment to kick the door to mindfulness wide open. I wish I could share any one thing specific to help anyone replicate the experience. I honestly think this kind of Gnostic awakening has to be tailored to the individual. Also, I was told I was a quick study at this - so sadly, it may take a long time to get there (months to years even).

One exercise we did that helped a lot was to have a discussion with your younger self, and explore what you would say knowing what you know now. Like with a lot of this stuff, the key is to verbalize - it's fundamentally different than talking to yourself with your inner monologue. So you're gonna need a close friend that you can share a LOT of deeply traumatic experiences. Pulling punches and censoring your own speech is just going to get in the way. Fundamentally, this is what we pay counselors for: privacy, not judging, and helping to take out the trash. Group therapy may help here too - I have yet to try this, so YMMV.

On a more specific note, I used to be obsessed with root-cause-analysis for my own psychological problems. I almost got into an argument with my counselor over it, until he was able to help me see the light. You can absolutely figure out why and even how you got this way, but that information will absolutely not help you if you're already in a safe space. It can help you break free of someone or a bad situation, but stuff that happened 30 years ago? Not so much. When you get down to it, there's no "undo" button for trauma, no matter how much you know. Instead, one must look to the present, exercise mindfulness in the moment of anxiety and triggers, and practice walking your headspace back to a more rational place.

Edit: this was all during the pandemic, BTW. I can't say that compares to what we have going on today, but I can confidently say that it's possible to focus on self-help despite all that. It's really possible to separate "things that are going on in the world" and "things that are just me" in your own head, and work on the latter.

[–] Snowclone@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (4 children)

Try and take time to soothe your inner child. Eat a bowl of Mac and cheese, try to go surfing, do dumb shit kids do. You know. Try it. Also learn to love yourself. Fucking good luck though, man that one... like how the fuck could that ever happen.

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