dullbananas highlights

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.ca/post/39612559

John goes to the bar, which is a daily occurrence. Mia the bartender does not like John's policies as Senator. When seeing John, Mia is reminded of the risk of a catastrophic income reduction as a result of abolishing the minimum wage, which John supports. Mia believes that drinking alcohol is the only way to become dumb enough to want to abolish the minimum wage, so starting today, he refuses to give alcohol to John. This becomes a physical fight. John tries to go behind the counter to grab alcohol. Mia throws John's entire body back, slamming his head on the ground. Mia then shouts at John "Your support for abolishing the minimum wage gives me stress. It's your fault that I'm still single because I have too much stress to attract anyone." John says "You're single? Me too!" They stare at each other for ten seconds. Mia says "Let's go on a date in the park right now." John accepts, then they go to the park. They sit at a table. Mia massages John's back for a few seconds, then John says "I'm John, and I approve this massage."