Ask Lemmy

I have given sporadically in the past, depending on how poor I was at the time, etc.

I don't carry cash at all anymore, though.

Depends on if they are playing me out. I've hung out and drank or smoked weed with homeless people if they were authentic. If not they can fuck off and their evil can bring them suffering.

The same goes with anyone else, mainstream or street.

Depending on how they ask, it's either a short polite "no" or I just ignore them (it's mostly the former, thankfully). I rarely, if ever, have cash on me. And although it sometimes happen, I'm not exactly safe from a single bad month putting me under anyway.

Something I won't do is insult/harass/otherwise make them even more miserable. If I can't help them, I'm sure as hell won't make things worse for them.

I don't really carry cash due to devaluation of currency in my country(our biggest banknote can buy 1 kg of chicken as a reference) but I typically carry some biscuits with me, so I'd offer it.

I usually don't give money, but once a year give 100€ or so to our local homeless support organization, who are also regularly giving out meals and coffee.

It's not honest but effective:

Make and maintain eye contact from at least 20 feet away, when you're close enough to be heard: ask them if they have any spare change.

"Seriously? Do I look like I have money?"

Give them some cash, if I have a little extra. I recommend carrying a little change if you live in an area with regular homeless folks.

I used to bring a particular homeless guy who hung around my block a sandwich on my way to work, and a beer when walking my dog on Friday nights (if I saw him, for either occurrence). That was all when I lived in a different city though.

“No” “no thanks” or “sorry, no”

I vote and contact my elected officials to tell them to provide unrestricted supportive housing.

i give them money, just $10. I feel bad and I'll be thinking about it all day. Even if they do something wrong with it at least they know someone cared

I try to have food bars and give it to them. Hopefully they eat it and not trade it for drugs or something

I give what I can when I can. It's rare to have actual cash, but if it's close to a restaurant I just ask if they want food or drink and buy them something with my card. Takes 5 minutes and is just a small act of kindness and support from another person. Most people don't even acknowledge they exist, let alone talk to them.

Life under capitalism seriously sucks for all of us (except a few hundred people), if I can maybe help make someone's day a little less shitty I'll try.

I don't mean this in a judgemental way at all, but just remember that they are humans too, just like you or I. Most people do not realize just how insanely lucky they are to be able to do basic things like work and have a house and car and have money and all that many people don't get the same opportunities and are dealt a bad hand in life through no fault of theirs. One big medical bill can make someone homeless in this system. Don't feel bad or awkward about having some resources that others don't have, but you can also slow down and share a little.

Treat other people how you would want to be treated if roles reversed. Simple as that.

Again, I don't mean to make anyone feel bad for not giving. I also don't mean to elevate myself in the least, I'm not any better than you, I'm just trying to help people see the humanity in others regardless of money.

Unfortunately, I've had my fair share of ungrateful ones that kind of ruin it for everyone. Not even a thank you, just rip it off my hand and walk away like I'm a nuisance. I'm much more selective nowadays, but I do give occasionally.

In the northeastern U.S. I've mostly learned to acknowledge them, don't give anything, and move on with my life.

Not sure if it's bad luck or what, but nearly every time I've tried to be nice and offer them something it always backfires. I'll be passing by with some food and they'll ask me for some, I give them some and then they tell me it wasn't enough and to give them all the food I was carrying. Like WTF?

Another time I actually had some change on me so I gave him some and he said it wasn't enough money and started following me, wanted me to go to an ATM so I can take out more money for him. I was forced to tell him to stop following me or I'd have to call the cops.

I have even more stories like that.. going through those motions repeatedly it feels like the homeless have taught me not to give to the homeless. But hopefully your experiences have better outcomes.

I wonder if the people saying they give money every time live in major cities (and walk often).

If I gave a quarter to everyone who asked me for change, I'd be out over $200 per year. Double that if they're still going to ask me on my way back (which is likely).

Some of them would also be rolling their eyes at a quarter. Some panhandlers can even become aggressive if they don't like what they get.

I'm not going to say that these people are going to waste the money on drugs, though some will (and I don't care what they do with the money, really). But I'd rather...

• Donate that money to food banks and other causes
• Not carry around unnecessary change
• Not risk pulling out my wallet in the city (in case I forget to keep the change handy)
• And NOT turn city sidewalks into tolled walkways for people who can't afford a car

As for what I do? I do the hand thing and apologize. I make eye contact (or at least look their way). If they ask again, I tell them I don't have anything. There's no reason to feel shame for not giving. Like someone else said, it's a numbers game.

If there are regulars and people who are genuinely down on their luck, then (if you have the time and willingness), you could talk to them, and maybe offer to buy them food or something.

Of course, there's always the chance that they'll bring the food back and ask for a refund. But hey, they would've used your $20 the same way.

When I was driving through an area frequently that had a large amount of homeless I'd pack a few extra sandwiches, granola bars and bottles of water to give out. I also kept gallon bags and a large bag of dog food for those who had dogs. I never once had someone turn down food and ask for money instead.

I say "sorry not today" or something similar but also offer food if I have it. I've usually got a Clif bar or something. Also nice to have emergency blankets for winter hand outs.

Edit: just remember they are people too. Regardless of their current situation. Some might have mental health issues, others maybe substance abuse problems, some might just be down on their luck and unable to find work. Treat them with the respect you would want if you were in their shoes.

If I don’t want to give them money, I just say “sorry I don’t have any cash.” Easy Peasy.

Homeless people endure constant hardship, abuse and dehumanising behaviour. I might not give money, but I'm careful to avoid dehumanising them.

1. You can carry around smaller denominations if you do want to give something.

2. If they're close to a convenience store then I offer to go in and buy something for them (tell them a budget and ask about and preferences or restrictions).

3. If I'm not going to give anything, I still make eye contact, try to have a sympathetic smile on my face and say something like "I'm sorry, do take care". I don't know if this is dumb or patronising, but I'm trying to avoid being dehumanising as the constant response they get is for people to avoid eye contact, walk around with a wide gap or ignore completely. I want to try to at least acknowledge and respond.

My standard is to say something like "I don't have any cash to share, good luck to you though." I work in homeless services and know a ton of folks who survive on panhandling. In my area, people have no problem finding food, there are a ton of social service orgs and churches that provide food daily.

The following is not a judgment and is a generalization that is far from universal. This is just a description of what I commonly observe. The unfortunate reality is that much of the money people get from panhandling goes to purchasing cigarettes, alcohol, meth, K2, crack, and/or fentanyl. For this reason I avoid giving people money directly.

You don't need to explain yourself to anyone, and if you feel bad for not giving someone money because you feel the inequality, consider donating your time or money to organizations in your area that are doing the work to help people gain employment or housing, meet their basic needs, or treat their physical or mental health needs.

I just apologize and move on, never had a bad experience. I do feel bad afterwards, but I'm from LATAM and it's basically a 50/50 wether you get ripped off or not, so I'm not risking it.

Panhandling is a numbers game - both parties know this and it’s okay to say no.

If I were to go back to walking into work and dealing with it daily then I’d have my headphones on and would be ignoring.

20s? Someone recently told me "my dad taught me to always carry some change with me, other people need it more than me" and now I'm doing it too. There really isn't any other way to act if you pride yourself on your humanity, anything else is rationalizing selfishness. And I often hear the "they're just gonna use it for booze/drugs!!!" line as if it meant anything. Sure, they might, but even if you're a strict teetotaler (and if you're in any Western country odds are you're not, lol), what else would they do? Have you ever slept on a cold floor while hungry? People kill themselves/complain about life and they have beds, meals, narcotics and internet connections, nvm all sorts of legal drugs to help them cope with everything (something like 15 percent of women in the US are on antidepressants, according to the CDC...). Life is hard sometimes, perhaps they also need to disconnect a bit, idk.

Give when you can, don't rationalize it when you can't. We're all collectively responsible for the playground God made for us and everything/one in it, but you're also just one man/woman. Maybe they'll turn their lives around, maybe your grain of sand will help them reach that point.