memes

My 11-month old is an absolute saint when we're out and about, then a horrifying tornado of destruction when he's at home. I suspect a lot of it is just boredom, but its hard to tell because... 11-mo olds aren't great at verbalizing their discontent.

As he gets older and he starts losing that starstruck look of wonderment at the mall or a new restaurant or wherever, I suspect he'll be harder to control. But he's also incredibly clever, athletic, and curious. I don't want to discourage any of this just to make parenting a bit easier in the short term.

Can't fucking imagine actually hitting him. I know what that did to me after the rare few times my mom did it. I still can't bring myself to forgive her 30 years later. And there's no way I want my son thinking of me that way.

Every child i encounter is extremely well behaved

There is essentially universal agreement in the field of child psychology that "beating" your child is the wrong approach.

I've yet to meet a parent that completely ignores their child in a public venue. In many cultures children are considered to be a part of society / community and so they are given some autonomy to discover the world with their peers. Hyper individualistic Western society is really the odd one out here and Western cultures are the only ones where I've seen this take expressed openly. Conclude from that what you will.

I don't mind rambunctious children, as long as they aren't hurting anyone, doing ear piercing screaming, or doing something that spreads disease. (Like putting their hands directly into ice cream topping trays instead of using the fucking scoop)

Frequently I see parents be way overly harsh with their kids where I'm at like the parent is terrified of being seen as a bad/lazy parent so they take it out on their kid by way over reacting to a kid doing something disruptive but ultimately pretty harmless.

There are occasional situations where the parent just dumbly stands there doing nothing to stop their kid doing something they really shouldn't (like that Ice Cream Topping example... which is a thing I recently witnessed). But that's less common than the former. Might be because I live in a rural conservative hellhole where kids are seen as their parent's property.

When I was a kid, my parents used to leave me at home with my brother and he would be abusive af. He tied me up ones with zipties. One time, I felt so scared of my brother, I had to run away from home. I'm so used to all this, every time I hear my mother's voice, I feel terrified, its like PTSD-inducing.

Then my mother gets [suprisedpikachuface.jpg] when I have depression. What did you expect, bitch, you caused this.

I don't hit my kids, I barely even yell. They're the most well-behaved kids I know. Almost as though respecting your kids and spending time with them makes them happier? And maybe kids that feel respected act better? It's a parenting problem. Youth are the future, we the parents decide what that future looks like.

Can we please leave TikTok face on TikTok? I come here specifically to escape the brain rot.

ITT people taking issue with parenting methods not even being advocated for. If you take your children to public places, of course everyone knows they are children, but they still shouldn't be pulling stuff off racks, running around screaming and licking the windows, or putting hands on other people or children.

You don't have to yell at them or beat them or anything else, but if they can't pull themselves together in public then work on it and consider not bringing them to such places. My mom made us all repeat the rules before we left the car (no running, no putting things in the cart without being asked, keep one hand on the cart while we are moving or something like those) and if we didn't follow the rules we all went back to the car. Simple as that.

Edit: sometimes you gotta go do something and take the kids. If they're acting feral at least maybe don't be the parent who looks like they are totally cool with it and just pretend it isn't happening?

Being a parent is hard af

I swear, Americans are obsessed with the idea that kids need a beating once in a while. That would get you arrested where I am from.

All I want is enough differentiated "adult only" spaces. I won't say anyone how to raise their kids, just let me be in a space where that parenting is not happening.

It's crazy seeing kids being kids. In the 90's abuse was legal and used, daily. I guess the trade off is life expectancy since we didn't dodge bullets on the daily.

It's pretty hard being a dad and wanting to not hit my kids (which I do not) because I know damn well when they're throwing shit and having an absolute exorcist level tantrum over some inconsequential shit I just think "yeah my mum would have smacked my ass and I'd not have done that again" for the eighth time each day..

"Calm it down or you'll lose your tablet time" doesn't have the same immediate corrective effect.