496
...did everyone get this? (startrek.website)
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[-] andrew@lemmy.stuart.fun 62 points 11 months ago

From now until then you're invincible.

[-] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 22 points 11 months ago

I've been saving an old toaster to try in the tub just for an occasion like this!

[-] tryitout@infosec.pub 13 points 11 months ago

You could make so much money playing Russian roulette!

[-] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 12 points 11 months ago

Now I'm starting to wonder if being in a coma for twenty years from a toaster/gun shot would still qualify as alive.

Dammit

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 19 points 11 months ago

The 1950s sci-fi pulp author Fredric Brown wrote one of his (then) famous short-short stories about a man who came up with the serum for immortality and took it, but he had a cold at the time, and the germs also developed immortality and reproduced so much that his symptoms got worse and worse and eventually put him into a coma. After a while, his colleagues realized he'd never get out of the coma, so they just buried him.

[-] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 11 points 11 months ago

That's horrible. Thank you

[-] bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

And this is why we have GFCIs, folks

[-] WarmSoda@lemm.ee 4 points 11 months ago

Because there's immortals walking among us?

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)
[-] ivanafterall@kbin.social 23 points 11 months ago

No, mine had a different date. Must just be a bug.

[-] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

What is this "wrapped" thing everybody but me knows about?

[-] ivanafterall@kbin.social 6 points 11 months ago

Spotify gives you an overview of your listening activity every year with different stats, like top artists, top songs, which city your listening tastes match, etc.

[-] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

And Spotify tells people when they're going to die?

[-] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

Yes but it is occasionally off by a second or two, what with free will and all.

[-] ivanafterall@kbin.social 9 points 11 months ago

That's the joke part.

[-] happilybitchycowboy@lemmy.world 21 points 11 months ago

Not gonna make it that long. Nice try.

[-] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 16 points 11 months ago

Awww man, I don't wanna do this shit for another 20 years just to die.

Can we make it sooner?

[-] Decoy321@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

Be the change you want to see in the world!

[-] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Where's the nearest bridge?

EDIT: for reasons, this is a joke.

[-] Sanyanov@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago

November 4, 2097...I'm gonna have a long life, it seems!

[-] wafflez@lemmy.world 7 points 11 months ago

dang, Feb 23rd 2067 for me

[-] notepass@feddit.de 6 points 11 months ago
[-] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

4.. 3.. 2.. 1

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 11 months ago

Shit, that's my 82nd birthday. Make sure to send a gift on the 22nd that year.

[-] Land_Strider@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Dunno, it sounds like 90's to me.

[-] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 16 points 11 months ago

Hah, now there is nothing candlejack ca

[-] Thaumiel@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

I don't get it. Who's Candleja

[-] Decoy321@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

My favorite thing about this bit is that, after he gets you, he takes the time to submit the comment you were trying to write. Candlejack is really courteous like th

[-] jacktherippah@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago

Mine says "December 5th 2023"

[-] eezeebee@lemmy.ca 4 points 11 months ago

Weird. Mine says "December 3rd 2023"

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

Mine says 1997. Just 1997.

[-] Numberone@startrek.website 4 points 11 months ago

Just doing a wellness check. Did you make it?

[-] cicadagen@ani.social 7 points 11 months ago

I don't think so... RIP eezeebee, they were like a father to us and we were like sons to them.

[-] FleetingTit@feddit.de 3 points 11 months ago

Have a nice last day on earth, buddy.

[-] cashews_best_nut@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Can we swap? I'd love to die tomorrow.

[-] spacesweedkid27@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Well. Did you?

[-] walter_wiggles@lemmy.nz 14 points 11 months ago

laughs in climate wars

[-] spacesweedkid27@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago

Imagine knowing that you'll live this long from now. Would be great

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

I sure hope I live past 66...

[-] PatFussy@lemm.ee 7 points 11 months ago

Ima die on my birthday? Man that sucks

[-] The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website 5 points 11 months ago

It makes the math easier though

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

You can't tell me when I die! Only I get to decide when I die!

[-] Sanyanov@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago

Secret of immortality unlocked

[-] Jon_Servo@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

Gross. I'd hate having to live an extra ~20 years.

[-] ipha@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Too optimistic to be real.

[-] TIMMAY@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

that's so long from now though

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 0 points 11 months ago

YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHEN I'M GOING TO D............

this post was submitted on 03 Dec 2023
496 points (96.3% liked)

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