this post was submitted on 02 Oct 2025
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LinkedinLunatics

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A place to post ridiculous posts from linkedIn.com

(Full transparency.. a mod for this sub happens to work there.. but that doesn't influence his moderation or laughter at a lot of posts.)

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[–] MNByChoice@midwest.social 33 points 2 days ago

We offered the CEO $550 million as a benefit. A gesture. A show of vision only a Super Board can have.

Instead, they treat it like a right. Like pay is something they're owed.

Some cash those checks. Some have it direct deposited. Different labels, same result, money leaves the company.

And that's when it hit me. If you really enjoy your job, why would you ever want to be paid for it?

Or am I the only one who sees it this way?

[–] Thteven@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago (5 children)

What kind of psychopath enjoys working?

[–] Zwrt@lemmy.sdf.org 18 points 2 days ago

For own personal growth or the general benefit of my local society absolutely.

Don’t even need a salary as long as the means to live happy are otherwise provided.

For the profit of a corporation? No, yuck!

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 2 points 1 day ago

I enjoy working. I just hate being told what to work on

People who sit at a desk for 4 hours a week doing jack all and making 100x what their full Time employees make.

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[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If you really like running why would you ever stop running?

[–] Sinatra 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 day ago

Guess you dont like running then

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 32 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I have such a hard time imagining this is actually a real person writing a real post.

[–] anas@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It’s way easier if you assume that any LinkedIn post you see is satire.

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 day ago

definitely better for my image of humanity

[–] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 18 points 2 days ago

If you really enjoy your job, why would you ever want time away from it?

Good point, maybe you should think about that a little harder bro.

[–] PrivateNoob@sopuli.xyz 303 points 3 days ago (6 children)

I hate that we are in a timeline that I can't be absolutely sure that this is satire anymore.

[–] hakeahnig@lemmy.world 79 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (5 children)

It absolutely is. This was his next post

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[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 145 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I can no longer tell which ones are real and which are satire.

[–] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 days ago (5 children)
[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago (2 children)

If that's linkedin he's 100% serious. Otherwise, 50-50.

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[–] pressanykeynow@lemmy.world 22 points 2 days ago (14 children)

USA needs some worker rights laws(apart from free healthcare, free education and others), in normal countries you'll be in trouble if you somehow didn't take your 28 days(more in some) of vacation, or were spotted at work in those days.

[–] psud@aussie.zone 2 points 1 day ago

in normal countries you'll be in trouble if you somehow didn't take your [leave]

I don't know how it works where you are, in my workplace if you don't take enough leave you need to make an agreement with your manager to take some leave soon; if you fail to make an agreement or the agreement is too far in the future you are put on leave.

I don't count that as being in trouble, it's about giving the worker the power to say "if you won't approve my leave, the system will force leave and you'll have no choice of when"

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[–] AlteredEgo@lemmy.ml 18 points 2 days ago (1 children)

He's not wrong, IF companies were worker controlled by law. Like a cooperative. Workers would enjoy their work more and would want to work more if they had agency. We are supposed to be a democracy, so why don't get workers the right to vote on who their managers are, what to do with the profits (after paying back loans) and how many working hours there should be?

Imagine if you'd mandate that even shitshows like fox news were suddenly worker controlled instead of by incorporated demons of greed. Workers generally want to create a good product and make customers happy, and in the case of news agencies they'd want to inform their readers well.

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[–] Knoxvomica@lemmy.ca 44 points 2 days ago

"I offered my employees a salary, they then expected the full salary paid out. Miserable, ungrateful wretches."

[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 14 points 2 days ago

I could tell it was satire because of his title, "probably the weirdest CEO of a recruit", but it's one of those cases where you just know a significant amount of bosses looks at that and sincerely agree

[–] KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone 46 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"I'm an insufferable rich cunt who doesn't do much at work, I have enough money to pay other people to do everything for me in the rest of my life, so I spend my free time persuing any hobby or interest I want, I'm also very empty inside so spend most of my time working."

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[–] caboose2006@lemmy.world 22 points 2 days ago (1 children)

After being America pilled I moved to China and had a British roommate. My mind was blown when he told me his mom took paid vacation days to tidy the house. I would NEVER dream of using the 14 days of vacation I had in the USA to clean the fucking house. Just IMAGINE having so much time off that you'd even consider using some to clean the house. It seemed awesome to me.

[–] NotJohnSmith@feddit.uk 15 points 2 days ago

As a Brit that's crazy, that's what WFH is for ;)

[–] Rose_Thorne@lemmy.zip 105 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I had a boss like this once! Fucker pushed for overtime every night, argued against taking vacation, and would bitch people out for taking sick days, calling anyone who took time off lazy.

Turned out he fucking despised his wife, but didn't want to go through the "shame of divorce"(his words, after she kicked off the divorce).

Hope that dude stubs his toes every morning.

[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 52 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I’ve definitely noticed a correlation of people “married to the job” because they don’t like the person they’re legally married to at home. It seemed to lead to a spike in divorces when the lockdowns hit during COVID.

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[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 43 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Sounds like a real stupid guy.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 34 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I mean, he already said he was a CEO…

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[–] baggachipz@sh.itjust.works 70 points 3 days ago (12 children)

The places to watch out for are the ones who have “unlimited” vacation time. That actually means “ooh, now’s really not a good time…”

[–] Schal330@lemmy.world 26 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I think there was a company (might have been Virgin?) that did unlimited holiday, but the issue was that people ended up feeling ashamed for taking holiday and so basically ended up taking less than if they were given 25 days holiday.

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 39 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Even if you love doing something, you'll eventually want a break. What this guy is describing is addiction. Work addiction is one of many types of addiction that isn't even seen as such because while it can destroy everything else in your life, it likely won't stop you from being financially successful and that's the only measure of success anyone actually gives a fuck about, it seems.

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[–] iamdefinitelyoverthirteen@lemmy.world 51 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Even though I live what I do, getting paid is literally the only reason I go to work. If they did not pay me, I would not go.

[–] nailbar@sopuli.xyz 23 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (4 children)

I like my job. If I wasn't getting paid, I'd still be doing it. Just not for them.

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[–] Infrapink@thebrainbin.org 35 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I'm pretty sure this person is joking.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 19 points 3 days ago

we live in an age where almost all satire has happened at least 10 times

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[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 43 points 3 days ago (7 children)
[–] Technofrood@feddit.uk 29 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Not plus unfortunately as they can include the bank holidays in your statutory 28 days

Bank holidays

Bank or public holidays do not have to be given as paid leave.

An employer can choose to include bank holidays as part of a worker’s statutory annual leave.

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[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I love my job. I really do. I also love other things more. It’s not rocket surgery.

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[–] Routhinator@startrek.website 17 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I love my field, I hate the majority of jobs in my field because while tech can do many cool and wonderful things and could be solving many more issue, most companies are busy doing what one percenters want and pushing for the least effort solutions and everything is always a cram. No breathing space, no time to enjoy the product and reflect on what to do next. Just cram, enshittify, add tracking, automate away your peers, do more with less people so we can fire more people.

I'm so sick of the efficiency rat race that capitalist investors demand.

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[–] ZeroGravitas@lemmy.dbzer0.com 38 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Your salary has been made available in your corporate account, but why would you want to use it all and deprive your employer of the extra security a cash reserve brings? Work well done should be its own reward after all. A shareholder cries every time you make a withdrawal.

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[–] kat_angstrom@lemmy.world 35 points 3 days ago

If you really enjoy spaghetti & meatballs, why would you ever want to eat anything else?

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 21 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I have an idea! Co-operatives, taxed automation, total freedom! Fuck work! Fuck all work! Most of us had enough of it for a lifetime. Even if you believe in working hard and earning your keep, the real issue is, you don't actually get to enjoy much of the results! You waste time you could have spent helping others, getting fit, developing your skillsets and hobbies! Living life! Experiencing things!

[–] AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 20 points 3 days ago (5 children)

I've always thought the idea of a neighborhood working together would do wonders. "John down the street loves cars so if u need a fix go see him, oh and this weekend we're all helping roof his house cuz he helps us with cars and Hank across the street is gonna grill burgers for us" etc etc stuff like that.

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