Pay me for the commute if you want your employee there on time.

There's a McDonald's across from the entrance to the garage of my apt building. The number of cars that will be lined up waiting to go through the drive through in the morning on weekends is staggering. It's some of the shittiest fast food you can get and cars go around the intersection in line.

“You late, but I see you had time for coffee.”

“The reason I’m late happened after I bought the coffee, asshole! How was I supposed to know some random road by the office would be floooded?!”

Them: Don't talk to me until I've had my morning coffee

Also them: I'd like a venti skinny mocha caramel frappachino with an extra pump of vanilla and no whipped cream.