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[-] neidu2@feddit.nl 63 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Bonobos have it all figured out.
Something scary happened a few trees over? Sex!
A logging vehicle spotted in the distance? Giggity!
Little timmy fell down the well? ❤️
Some hairless ape left an empty cardboard box on the ground? Cue the porn groove.
Chimpanzees encroaching on you territory? Let's outbreed them!

EDIT: The downvotes are from chimpanzees.

[-] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

I wonder how they have time to accomplish anything else in life

I also wonder how long their refractory period is.

[-] then_three_more@lemmy.world 31 points 9 months ago
[-] JoYo@lemmy.ml 24 points 9 months ago

both species live in social groups that exhibit both sexual and violent behaviors.

[-] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 9 points 9 months ago

Mafuckas read 'Sex at Dawn' and think they got it all figured out. And then they try to get their friends to swing with them.

[-] HelixDab2@lemm.ee 5 points 9 months ago

Or read Palahniuk and want their friends to swing on them.

[-] moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 9 months ago

There's probably some MF DOOM lines that'd fit with that

[-] BluJay320@lemmy.blahaj.zone 18 points 9 months ago

Violent sex

Problem solved

[-] PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 3 points 9 months ago

Instructions unclear, Slaanesh is telling me to use more car battery clamps, they aren't specifying how or what to use them for

[-] HelixDab2@lemm.ee 15 points 9 months ago

Given that free love experiments have generally failed in human history, while limitless violence experiments are a roaring success, I think I know which way humans have gone.

[-] DragonTypeWyvern@literature.cafe 7 points 9 months ago

Bonobos, knowing that ACAB, didn't have a CIA to invent HIV.

[-] paddirn@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago
[-] OozingPositron@feddit.cl 4 points 9 months ago

Everyone belongs to everyone.

[-] h3ndrik@feddit.de 8 points 9 months ago

It's funny because it's true?

[-] marcos@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

Well, it's not really true. Both of those descriptions are highly flawed.

[-] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago
[-] yetiftw@lemmy.world 18 points 9 months ago

that's half of the joke, good job!

[-] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

I had bonobos confused with gibbons for a few hours, so I think that's why it didn't match up right for me.

[-] Furball@sh.itjust.works 4 points 9 months ago

Both, but it doesn’t work

[-] Aggravationstation@lemmy.ml 4 points 9 months ago
this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2024
513 points (96.4% liked)

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