Mists of avalon, by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Feminist retelling of the Arthurian legend.
Other religions exist, they change, perspectives change. Etc. Helped me break free from catholic upbringing.
Tiny handle, small, would be to slippery to handle with blood involved.
It's threaded with spiraling time threads, like symphonic Christmas lights dancing in an ethereal breeze. Touch one of these time threads, and millenias worth of physics explodes along my skin. You can hear the whispered susurrations of cosmic eddies trembling thru the universe, the songs of stars. It is bright like sherbert, cold and warm on the flesh, and every fiber of my being is rapturously tesselated.
Awesome show. Yeah, I'm a bit iffy about how it ended, but it could've been so much worse.
Personally, would rather not. Would have preferred a choice. To not exist is a fantasy, for all things to cease, all of this trauma, drama gone. Often wish futurama suicide booths were an actual thing.
But, can see how others would find being alive appealing. One can have some pretty interesting experiences, learn stuff, etc.
Pi is listed to 90 decimal points, taped to wall across from bed. I recite it over and over when going to sleep. =)
Was done by multiple people. Some relatives, some not. Decided that wasn't the life for me, cut ties, moved far away. It is survivable. Tks for kind words
Ritalin. Coke or pepsi.
Dbt. Cbt.
Starter exercise. There's a teacup sitting on the table in front if you. Look at it. What's its shape, color, how is light hitting it? Slowly reach for it, pick ut up, feel the weight in your hands..... can do this, with any object, for just 30 seconds once a week. Over time, becomes habit.
At all times, there is chatter going on in your brain. All you need to do is recognize it. Whenever I feel thoughts spiraling out of control, I say a 4 word phrase. Others use different tactics. One person drove a lot for work, and when pulling into intersection, if they saw a stop sign, instant reminder. ... practicing this til it becomes habit.
Narrating your actions. I'm back from walk, approaching door, hand on door knobs, taking keys out of my pocket. Narrating forces you to slow down, step by step.
Slow, calm breathing from the diaphragm.
Stop, close eyes. One by one, focus on each of your senses. Taste in mouth. Smell of wet leaves. Warm wind against skin, etc.
The 5 w's. Recite. My name is, I'm a human, it's this time and day, I'm at this location, this is why I'm here.
That's just to start.
Don't have internet where I live. But your suggestion sounds way helpful.