The old man's name:

Inigo Montoya

Yep. Pretty fucked no matter which way you look at it...

Has anyone informed you of Sithrak the Blind Gibberer?

You're lucky!

I once had one with a movement of 80 that could only cast Haste on herself, then forget she cast it and slam into Everything at high speed.

Dolphins are known to be assholes, and Orcas are really big dolphins. That beach dive move is like swerving to hit an animal in the grass/sidewalk on the side of the road.

If Trump decides to help Ukraine

Putin's not going to let him...

With the president, Congress, and the Supreme Court all being in Trump's cult I fear for global politics as a whole, and I'm not sure which country the US will be at war with first.

I was always partial to "Chill"

Hey Siri, what's the LD50 for chicken nuggets?

Aww, damn... I'm busted!

I forgot I have fished a few computers & cable boxes out of the trash... Got a 1TB HD out of a trashed cable box, planning on getting home assistant & jellyfin running soon, so a little extra storage always helps!

I stopped pulling over to pull useful items out of other people's trash.

I still look, but I haven't yanked a chair or TV in years.

Should have bought her a chocolate bar, too

Indiana: At least we're not Ohio!

Time traveler making sure his changes stuck.

The other timeline is... not so good.