[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

Am I the only one here who can't work out what the second person is saying in that reply? Having a "has anyone really been far even as decided..." moment.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

I feel so silly because a friend of mine showed concern early on, saying it's easy for guys who are avoidant/emotionally unavailable to love-bomb you at the beginning and mean it, but then they get freaked out and run. I was like "yeah yeah sure" thinking it'd either not happen, or that I'd be able to handle it when it did. Clearly, I could not handle it haha.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

Wow, your story made me really sad for you, what a terrible way to be dumped. Thank you for sharing, it helps a lot to hear someone else's experience and remember that I'm not alone. Your comment really moved me I almost started crying again haha. Thank you for being so kind.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

Your words are so compassionate and matter-of-fact at the same time, and I think that's just what I needed. It's truly appreciated, thank you <3

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

You're absolutely right. I've accomplished so much since my last - and abusive - relationship. For some reason I was able to recover from it very quickly, and I say this as someone who took 5 years to fully get over my first (also abusive) bf.

I was VERY codependent and the relationship traumatized me, but less than 2 months after the breakup, I entered an international comedy competition and won first place. Suddenly people who didn't give a shit about me before wanted me on their shows. I had all sorts of new opportunities thrown at me and now I have a huge list of things I can happily brag about.

I probably would never have taken that sort of plunge when I was with my ex. Maybe hitting rock bottom + the anger made me fearless, I don't know.

I still struggle a bit with self-image and social anxiety, but I can see how far I've come and I think overall, I'm a pretty cool person.

Thank you for reminding me that I don't have to settle for someone who doesn't see that. You're right, I shouldn't have to convince someone to be with me. I'll tell myself that next time I have a "everything reminds me of him :'(" moment (and I'm having a LOT of those, ughh)

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 7 points 1 year ago

I'm pretty confident it wasn't due to a secret relationship. He's a digital nomad so he's never in one place for very long, which he'd stated early on as to why he doesn't expect to have a long term relationship with anyone.

So in fairness to him, he did try to manage my expectations. I knew it was a "situationship" and even told myself to not get too invested, just enjoy the moment with him etc and be ready to move on once he left.

I lost sight of that the longer we spent together, and despite what he said at the beginning, I naively thought that things were naturally developing into something more serious and that he'd be willing to do something long distance with me.

But in fairness to me also, he did say things like how he didn't expect that we'd become so close, that I was the first person to make him reconsider moving back to his home country, and he did all kinds of things that imo, most people wouldn't do for someone who's just a casual fling. It's just hard for me to understand that sort of inconsistency, but I guess all I can do is accept that people can be like that and that they'll disappoint you as a result.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 14 points 1 year ago

I had to quit my job not long ago to recover from burnout, and for some reason I decided to start using Arch btw even though I'm a kind of a linux noob (maybe as a more acceptable form of self-harm) and spent the next month locked away to tinker with it.

My setup is pretty much complete now, so I guess I'll just focus on growing a beard this time. Thanks for the great tips!

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

There are videos of people vaping cum, I'm sure those same people would do this.

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I fell for someone who lives in a different country. We met while he was passing through mine, and then he later changed some of his travel plans to come back and see me again.

We saw each other every single day for over a month, he met most of my friends, we went on trips together and overall he was very loving and did all kinds of things that made me feel like we had something that could last beyond a fling. He told me he would be back again.

His feelings changed not long after he went back home, and he only admitted it to me once I confronted him after noticing him become more and more distant over 2 months. He said he found it hard to stay emotionally invested in someone so far away.

I get that long distance is hard and that people's feelings change. I just didn't think he'd lose feelings for me so easily. It hurts more than ending a relationship that has slowly burned out over time, because I just can't make sense of how quickly this happened. And I think a large part of why I got so attached is because I very rarely meet guys I'm genuinely interested in, let alone ones that treat me well.

Have any of you gone through something similar? If so, how did you cope with it? Was there anything that made it easier to accept, or do I just need to let time do its thing? I have a bunch of important things to finish this week and have already lost so much time crying lol.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

Man, taste really is subjective because I have no idea how you can trash today's fashion while being totally ok with the cultural blunder that is early 2000s fashion.

I was looking at red carpet photos from some awards show in 2002, and everyone looked like they dressed themselves by stumbling blindly through the discount rack at Gap Kids. Probably the worst era in fashion history imo.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 6 points 1 year ago

Goblin moment hahaha. It was rocks when I was a kid, these days it's glass bottles. "I can't believe someone would just leave a perfectly good kombucha bottle!" put it in bag with the IPA bottle from yesterday

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Red flags (lemm.ee)
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Ventriloquism (lemm.ee)
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[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 7 points 1 year ago

This whole time I thought anime/hentai girls had unrealistic physiques.

[-] prenupbutter@lemm.ee 9 points 1 year ago

I am pretty sure this meme was made wrong on purpose for algorithm reasons by someone trying to drive more traffic to their page. Nothing like baiting people into correcting you in order to increase engagement.

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prenupbutter

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