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this post was submitted on 23 Aug 2024
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I am not surprised that conservatives find open signs of affection, and the general feelings and expression of love between a child and father, to be "weird".
These comments come from people whose kids hate and/or resent them. Love, in general, is seen by them as weakness. These people need therapy, they are mentally ill.
Conservatives think the only two possible roles for a father are distant or abusive. Love is probably "too woke" or something.
So I was curious and looked to see what percentage of conservative men seek therapy, and while I didn't get a number, I came across this interview with a conservative therapist.
At least according to the article, 90% of therapists have liberal values, which in my personal experience makes sense. But the problem is that it makes it difficult for conservatives to find a therapist that they can feel safe expressing their political views, but of course with therapy so frowned upon in conservative circles and they use the church for counsel (not counseling), it's tough for a conservative therapist to get work. It's a bit of a catch 22.
The therapist in the interview has so many stomach turning comments that personally I would not touch her with a 10 foot stick, but the point I do sympathize with is that therapy should be accessible to everyone, no matter your religious or political beliefs.
I think this really hits with the "I go to therapy because of people who don't go to therapy", but that article gave me a perspective of "oh, the people who don't go to therapy usually don't have a therapist they could go to to meet them at their level."
The problem is when you start getting into what a therapist is actually meant to do. A therapist isn't meant to just be someone you go talk to for an hour, they're meant to help you really work on your mental health. For a lot of these conservative men, the issue is their worldview. In order to help heal them and get these men what they would deserve out of therapy, you would need to show them how their negative worldview is built upon a mountain of lies, and get them to let go of their irrational hate. A therapist that buys into and feeds their worldview is just an enabler that would be effectively scamming conservatives.
I guess the problem with that argument is that it doesn't consider there are a variety of approaches to therapy that don't all work on some "core function".
Of course, Hank Green to the rescue once again!
Some therapy is designed to ignore deep trauma and rather focus on the most surface level things. We could go in circles all day about how 9/11 made you terrified of flying, but even if you found some answer, it wouldn't necessarily help. Instead maybe some exposure therapy or psychedelics or idk some other strategies can be used here and now.
I also think that even conservatives have differing worldviews within their own, so lumping it all together as a bad worldview doesn't work. Not all conservatives are angry and pissed off at everything and everyone. Not all liberals are the embodiment of enlightenment. When it comes to therapy, I think there is no one size fits all, and a conservative therapist may help a conservative patient in ways that a liberal therapist couldn't.
I'm okay with shitheads with shit views not having access to a shithead therapist that won't challenge their bullshit.
I consider people who disagree with me human, and deserving of access to healthcare. As a former childhood conservative, I also understand that changing views is a long process and we need guiding hands that can meet us where we are. I didn't change my views because someone hammered different views into me, I did it through conversations with people I agreed with on some things, and disagreed with on others.
Political affiliations are not monoliths. My conservative dad now supports a $20 minimum wage. My left wing uncle argued blackface theater is acceptable. Again, we are not monoliths but divisive propaganda wants us to believe the otherside is all bad and we are all good- from politics to religion to our favorite sports teams.
My "shithead" conservative aunt would ABSOLUTELY benefit from therapy. She has an eating disorder, trauma from losing her mom at 6 then living with a physically abusive father, and most likely undiagnosed BPD. I know for a fact I will never talk to her again because we've cut her off, but I also fully support her access to therapy that, while different than mine, would still be beneficial.
As far as the "shithead" comment; I will say to you what I said to my "shithead" aunt and uncle at the dinner table when asked "don't you just agree that conservatives, in general, are smarter than liberals?"
"I believe idiocy knows no bounds"
Edit: you said "shithead" not "dipshit"