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[-] the_post_of_tom_joad@sh.itjust.works 67 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

No lie, i did a cool line like this for real which isn't like me usually (I should mention im a dude probs)

On vacay near the French quarter, half-hammered and fully lost trying to get back to my hotel, a group of street kids crosses the street to get behind me. Maybe after a block of me playing it like I'm cool, this deep voice says from right behind me,

"i'm... gunna rape ya."

I whirled around and saw this guy leering down at me. Even if he weren't larger and younger than me, even if he didn't have half a dozen friends, I'm not tough. In the time i finished spinning i knew i wouldn't be winning any fights, but i surprised myself by asking

'Mouth or ass?... I just want to know what kind of night I'm having.'

He looked as surprised as i felt and laughed honestly.

You're alright, dude!

and everyone ~~clapped~~ just walked away chuckling, i found my hotel, and a fresh pair of underwear.

[-] MutilationWave@lemmy.world 11 points 13 hours ago

Based on my experiences with street punks around there they were probably just fucking with you.

[-] the_post_of_tom_joad@sh.itjust.works 2 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

Lol, I'm sure glad they were cuz I'm not a track guy either.

[-] Anticorp@lemmy.world 24 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago)

Ha! That's how you survive on the mean streets if you don't know how to fight.

this post was submitted on 17 Dec 2024
700 points (98.9% liked)

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