this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2025
355 points (98.9% liked)
RPGMemes
13550 readers
70 users here now
Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Assuming a level 20 druid, you'd have 32 slots 1 or above, 2 gallons per caster level so 40 gallons per cast, that's 1,280 gallons per day or however fast you can regain spells. A bit shy of half a million gallons in a year. A particularly long-lived elf could destroy 280 million gallons before keeling over.
Now it depends how big the world you're on is, but if it's earth-like, the smallest ocean on earth is... 4.9 quintillion gallons.
4,900,000,000,000,000,000
So while you wouldn't make a dent, a character with an irrational war against the ocean is hilarious and you should do it anyway.
So, the problem isn't how much water but how much time?
Become lich, be immortal, problem solved.
Now it's a race between you and the heat death of the universe or pissing off some God of the Sea for fucking up their backyard.
Umberlee definitely wouldn't be a fan.
aww yeah that's the best option. whenever i play d&d (if ever) i'll see if i'm able to get a druid and end up doing that
Maybe the duid can team up with a lvl 20 wizard that will open a Gate with his 9 lvl spell slot from the bottom of the ocean.
Dunno how to do the math, but a 20 feet diameter sink in the ocean opened in the sky of another plan for one minute may be faster (in spell slot economy) than lvl 9 destroy water.
How do you feel about goblins, by the way?
@SkyezOpen I think I miss a reference because I don't see any connection, sorry :/
Goblin slayer reference. Someone does that to kill a big bad with water pressure.
wait wait wait
could i just kinda put a stick on the mouth of a bag of holding and throw it in the ocean? (the stick is for keeping it open)
then i could throw a bunch of those in the ocean, and it'll at least help destroy it.
if this works like i think it does, i'll get something that lets me craft bags of holding, and i'll just spend the rest of every day (after casting destroy water) crafting bags of holding to throw into the ocean
also, don't worry about age. i am going to become a lich like someone suggested, so that i can just stay there, destroying the ocean very, very slowly, forever.
and please correct me if anything i said isn't possible!
For the amount of money you'd waste throwing bags into the ocean, you'd probably be better off hiring people to cast destroy water.
oh wait yeah that's an amazing idea
cast Gate on the bottom of the ocean
20ft wide portal to whatever other plane you want to dump the ocean in
at the bottom of the mariana trench you'd get some 200,000,000 gallons per minute through that sucker
it'll still take more than 3 million years (per very naive, optimistic napkin math) to drain all the oceans but you can probably find other people to join your mad ocean destruction cult over that time and get things going in parallel
the real question is: where are you putting all this water
oh i only hate the <whatever the common planet in D&D is>'s ocean, so i can just throw the water anywhere. i guess it'd be funny to throw it somewhere dry, though. so soke desert plane or whatever
Bags of holding are not infinitely sized, just big
aw i'm sad now