If I cut someone do they count as an open container?
this post was submitted on 26 Aug 2025
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If someone opens their mouth do they count as an open container?
Nope, people are tubes, not containers
Yeah, people are like these tubes specifically.
Just as fuckable, too
Actually those things are not that fuckable, because they roll along your penis instead of sliding. There is very little sensation other than cold squeezing.
🤷🏼♂️
That explains why water falls straight through
A tub with a plugged drain is the bottom is a container. Anyone wearing a buttplug is therefore a container.
Their intestines might, but not their lungs. Lungs are more liek a sponge
"free" shit costs a spell slot, you know?
Free() can destroy the world. Believe me. I know. I am a C programmer.
This is why I free nothing and only malloc().
#WhoNeedsMemoryManagement
#JustDownloadMoreRAM
You're sick with Java-Python Syndrome. The only cure is C++. But you're too old to master C++ before you segfault. Muahahahahaha!
You know, my biggest gripe with python isnt abstracted memory management. My biggest grip is duck typing
Duck typing is my favourite. Pry it from my cold dead (object that appears to be hands, and probably is, but maybe isn't).
At least it's strongly typed as well unlike JavaScript.
duck typing
Script languages are very nice for writing pre-100-lines long listings. Where you can keep all types in your head. Consider Python uber-bash. Unsuitable for anything else, though.
Shut up and getting castin' wizard. These biscuits ain't gonna season themselves
i can use create/destroy water on blood to get iron for my weapons?
Bloodplasma is mostly water, but blood is only about 55% plasma. Unsurprisingly, your blood actually has a LOT of stuff in it, like red blood cells.
Unless you want to count water in cells, but that would do the stuff that the spell doesn't do.
If it destroys water you have ions destroyed with the solution so no salt. Because it's a part of the water. If you did destroy the water then you would get sodium and chloride plasma because it's ionized.
Which is probably fine since, at this temperature, it will immediately convert to solid salt, albeit maybe with some impurities should some ions react with something else.
The plasma is why the magic glows.
i will get to a level where i have as many slots of destroy water as possible, and i will spend the rest of my life casting destroy water on the ocean, until it is completely dry. is that something i'd be able to do, or is that not possible? (i play pathfinder, not d&d, so i don't know)
Assuming a level 20 druid, you'd have 32 slots 1 or above, 2 gallons per caster level so 40 gallons per cast, that's 1,280 gallons per day or however fast you can regain spells. A bit shy of half a million gallons in a year. A particularly long-lived elf could destroy 280 million gallons before keeling over.
Now it depends how big the world you're on is, but if it's earth-like, the smallest ocean on earth is... 4.9 quintillion gallons.
4,900,000,000,000,000,000
So while you wouldn't make a dent, a character with an irrational war against the ocean is hilarious and you should do it anyway.
So, the problem isn't how much water but how much time?
Become lich, be immortal, problem solved.
Now it's a race between you and the heat death of the universe or pissing off some God of the Sea for fucking up their backyard.
Umberlee definitely wouldn't be a fan.
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Maybe the duid can team up with a lvl 20 wizard that will open a Gate with his 9 lvl spell slot from the bottom of the ocean.
Dunno how to do the math, but a 20 feet diameter sink in the ocean opened in the sky of another plan for one minute may be faster (in spell slot economy) than lvl 9 destroy water.
open a gate... Bottom of the ocean
How do you feel about goblins, by the way?
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wait wait wait
could i just kinda put a stick on the mouth of a bag of holding and throw it in the ocean? (the stick is for keeping it open)
then i could throw a bunch of those in the ocean, and it'll at least help destroy it.
if this works like i think it does, i'll get something that lets me craft bags of holding, and i'll just spend the rest of every day (after casting destroy water) crafting bags of holding to throw into the ocean
also, don't worry about age. i am going to become a lich like someone suggested, so that i can just stay there, destroying the ocean very, very slowly, forever.
and please correct me if anything i said isn't possible!
For the amount of money you'd waste throwing bags into the ocean, you'd probably be better off hiring people to cast destroy water.
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cast Gate on the bottom of the ocean
20ft wide portal to whatever other plane you want to dump the ocean in
at the bottom of the mariana trench you'd get some 200,000,000 gallons per minute through that sucker
it'll still take more than 3 million years (per very naive, optimistic napkin math) to drain all the oceans but you can probably find other people to join your mad ocean destruction cult over that time and get things going in parallel
the real question is: where are you putting all this water
oh i only hate the <whatever the common planet in D&D is>'s ocean, so i can just throw the water anywhere. i guess it'd be funny to throw it somewhere dry, though. so soke desert plane or whatever
After awhile, Poseiden comes and kicks your ass until you stop. Live by the magic sword, die by the magic sword.
oh don't worry i'm sure there are a bunch of gods that are against slowly destroy watering the entire ocean
Creativity = Killing everyone by taking great liberties in interpreting spells
Why can't I destroy all the water in a human's body? 🤔
How about Enlarge Spell with Create Water to kill them with the entire weight of an Olympic sized swimming pool falling onto them from 20 feet in the air?
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I cast destroy water on the fluid lining of his brain.
That would fall under the first part of this meme. You cannot see the fluid lining of his brain unless it is exposed in which case I feel like there's a far easier method of murder.
You cannot see the fluid lining of his brain unless it is exposed
I would like to submit, as a counterpoint, the Ring of X-Ray Vision from the 2014 5e basic ruleset.
Soooo... Destroy Water, please, Mr. DM.
Once again, this still falls within the first part of the meme as it violates the spells wording of "open container". If you're using X-Ray vision to see the brain then the brain is within a closed container.
Soooo... No, Mr. Player
<3
Don't forget that most bodily fluids are almost certainly not water
It wouldn't be (instantaneous) murder though.
Turn beer into moonshine!
Oh shit, that means I can a bucket of salt into free sea water.
Could you threaten the salt vendor with that?
Salt? Wait... sea warer can also contain so much more like magnesium. A perfect component for... explosive... with water...
sea water wouldn't be containing elemental magnesium, it would contain magnesium salts.
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