this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2025
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Mental Health

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It really seems honesty and kindness get you nowhere.

I’ve spent hundreds of hours volunteering. I donated money to good causes when I had it. I spoke up for others.

But I have nothing for it. No one will wish me happy birthday this year. No one will ever do any of the things that I did for others for me.

While evil people succeed. Narcissists can charm others into playing along with their world, people who do their jobs poorly will keep them.

Hard work, honesty, really any of those “positive” values seem to get you nowhere in life.

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[–] NoTagBacks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Framing. That's all it is.

Evil will thrive for a time, good will thrive for a time, ultimately that's not up to you. What others do and how they are or are not rewarded is not up to you. What does it matter anyway? Those who successfully do evil will die and be forgotten anyway, their actions having as little consequence as anyone else alive today.

You say you do your best to do good things? Great, focus on that. Because that is up to you. Whether in poverty or in absurd wealth, what matters is what you do with what you have. Evil people do evil things, it's to be expected. Why would you frustrate yourself with ignorant people acting as expected? And though it may be unjust, why compound it with anger over what you can't control?

Afterall, wouldn't you rather be governed by your commitment to bringing what good you can into the world instead of being consumed with frustration of evil acting like itself?

[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I want to be able to sleep comfortably and eat

[–] NoTagBacks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Of course, but it's never truly guaranteed for anyone, is it? I've been in poverty before, starved and homeless. Today I'm a Punk that got lucky, and I recognize I could just as easily lose it all tomorrow. Ultimately, it's not up to me what life throws at me at any given moment. I only have control over my reaction. I can tell you from personal experience that material security is not what primarily builds up stability of the mind.

I'm not some jackass that's going to tell you that basic necessities don't matter at all, rather that you've got to accept that they're never guaranteed. I won't spew some bullshit that evil people doing evil things isn't really all that bad, but rather that you need to accept the reality we all share. Life will throw bullshit after bullshit at you, but it will never dictate how you react to the bullshit. Your material conditions are forever a slave to circumstance, but your mind cannot be conquered by anyone but you.

[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

There is no stability of mind when I spent my childhood being sexually abused and being told to shut up about it, and when I have no social circle or interactions