this post was submitted on 02 Sep 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

Are these one time use? Like you gain the ability to talk to oysters forever? Grow a new nose as many times as you want? Or talk to oysters for 5 minutes and one extra nose?

  1. Become a water quality assessor with instant and accurate data on pollutants, if there are invasive species, whether or not there are pearls present, and any other information oysters can offer about the environment.

  2. Instant paving/gravel business with a huge profit margin compared to competitors.

  3. Depends on the locus of movement. If 7” only, like a quarter step in any direction, kinda useless*. If moving your entire body 7” away from it’s previous location, good for theft I guess if the barrier is less than 7” thick.

*if you can “spam” the 7” movement rapidfire with no speed limit, you can travel as fast as you can wherever you want in a “stuttering” teleport.

  1. Useful to someone disfigured, lost one to skin cancer or other issue.

  2. Depends on what you limit a toaster to and what constitutes control. If you can control any facet of any device that heats the interior for purposes of heating the contents to a specific temperature, then this is really powerful. Engines “toast” fuel. Kilns “toast” everything from carbon fiber to ceramics to tempering glass. You now operate the only successful fusion reactor on the planet. The ability to control the specific heating of any material in an enclosed environment would have wide application.

  3. Spam it.

  4. Catching smugglers? If a container that should be empty isn’t, you can’t see in it.

  5. Get your name in the history books as an expert on the peoples and culture surrounding the language.

  6. If you were a paraplegic this would be life-changing.

[–] nieminen@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The gravel one is gonna have some stupid loophole, like it's one pebble a day, but infinite and free.

[–] Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz 2 points 3 days ago

Free gravel appears instantaneously at will, but only in the very center of Ohio

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 1 points 3 days ago
  1. I don't think Mr. Einstein is able to run very fast, atm...