Hi all. I have briefly tried therapy over and over again, but could never find something that seemed to be a fit for me. So I could never stick with it more than a few sessions. I always had trouble describing what my issue was and I never liked the methods of any given therapist. Either they used CBT, which I find invalidating and victim blaming (I've always been taught that my thoughts and feelings are wrong...so this just makes it worse for me) or they used "talk therapy", which seemed incredibly pointless and gave me zero benefit.
I just started seeing a therapist who seems to use DBT techniques. At first, it seems a little less shitty than CBT because it doesn't want my emotions to go away or try to rationalize them away. It wants me to accept that I will have strong emotions and I need to figure out how to deal with them.
DBT still feels a bit victim blamey to me though to a degree. I've always been frustrated at how powerless I am and how people are allowed to do bad things to others and you just have to deal with it. So in that regard DBT seems more of the same of the frustration I've always felt. "It's your fault that you feel and react this way. You can't change the fact that people are horrible to you and others. You just have to deal with it and they get to do whatever they want." Been a lifelong frustration for me.
I have many problems in my life, but more recently I have discovered that one of my main ones seems to be "emotional dysregulation". I've struggled with having strong emotions even in childhood, where I would be chastised by my parents for it. My parents didn't abuse me, but it was frustrating that I was never heard.
Medication wise, I have been on an SSRI since the springtime, but couldn't tell if it made any noticeable difference. So my provider is having me taper off the SSRI and try lamotrigine instead (note that I do NOT have bipolar disorder).
Part of the problem is that I have long stretches of being totally fine interspersed with occasional episodes of extreme duress/issues. So normally when I see a provider, I feel totally fine and it's difficult to adequately express (or even sometimes remember) how significant my issues are. When I really need an appointment because I'm in crisis mode, I can't get one that soon. This pattern is part of the reason why I'm trying out lamotrigine.
Anyway idk just looking for your experiences. Thanks all. Sorry about the life story lol!
My post is a bit long winded lol sorry. I stated in it that my new therapist seems to be going with DBT for me. So yes I'll obviously be talking to them about it haha but I wanted to know people's experience with it. It seems like CBT is a bit more common.
No need to apologize! Mental health is a hard subject to approach and figure out on your own. You are doing the right thing asking people (especially professionals) for help!
I did CBT at first and then tried DBT. CBT is definitely more common I think. Sometimes it feels like homework but it is super worth it to at least give each exercise a try.