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this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2023
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Give them support. As someone who is socially challenged, there have been times where I think to myself "if my personality was bitter, who would act as if they cared". I know it's cliche to quote him, but it often feels like Nick from Zootopia spoke to a recurring element in our lives when he asked what the point is in being society's best when you're only going to be treated one way. Not that I'd act bitter, that's too far from my natural skillset, but for some people it comes naturally.
I get what you mean. I am on the autism spectrum and I struggle significantly with socialising with people. You know I just find it difficult. And there's no one that really reached out to me when I was a teenager. What broke that cycle for me was being the one who reached out and made friends with people other people never cared about. You know sometimes being the one that breaks a cycle like that can be powerful and it can even give you a stronger sense of self worth. But that's just for me. It might be different for you because I am a very extroverted person I just really struggle with the making connections part.
I never had the comfort zone issue, or any fear of approaching and talking to people. If anything, for me it is the skill. All the people I know depend on ongoing conversation and I can't provide that because my mind does not have that skill (and this is inherent), so I don't meet their cost requirement to make friends with them in any de facto way. If people were open to being silent with others and let the activities do the talking, that would be one thing, but that's not how it is.