I don't think you're wrong, but fairness where it is due, if you had a kid like Rory that was highly responsible, academically excelling, an active member of the community, and on track to go to an Ivy League school to do what she was passionate about... that doesn't leave a lot of room or need to parent at that point. You won the parent lottery, congrats! And at 16, nearing adulthood, and already more generally mature than many in their 20s (if still a bit naive), it's pretty normal to be letting otherwise well-behaving children start to become more independent and treating them as a young adult. That doesn't necessarily mean treating them like a peer/sister, but also in fairness, they enjoy all the same things and each other's company and they're closer in age than the average mother and daughter and have only had each other as family for most of Rory's life. There "friendship" does make it a struggle to actually parent and correct Rory on the odd occasion when she does actually need it, but it's not all bad as an example.