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Why isn't anyone farting in school?
(sh.itjust.works)
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this post was submitted on 27 Dec 2023
181 points (77.3% liked)
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Go to the bathroom between passing periods and let one out.
Improve your diet, don’t drink carbonated drinks.
I can’t believe I’m having this interaction on Lemmy
Figure out if you are lactose intolerant and don't have any milk or dairy products before going to school or during the day ..... have the cheese at the end of the school day.
Exercise and walk lots .... not intensive just keep moving. The digestive system works better when the body is moving ... the muscle movement especially your abdomen literally pumps and drives the digestive system.
The longer and more often you sit still, the more likely all that content will just sit and take longer to pass. The longer it sits, the more likely you'll build up gas, more gas, more farting.
Or, figure out if you are lactose intolerant. And if you are? Fill yourself up with dairy and be a true menace.
Just don't shit yourself. Otherwise, you're just the weird guy who shits himself.
I didn't know I was lactose intolerant for a long time. I used to have a carton of milk at morning break every day and release absolutely rancid SBDs afterward. One day was particularly impressive - the guy I had a crush on proclaimed it was so bad that if it had been his he would have named it.
What an asshole.