this post was submitted on 01 Jan 2024
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Funny

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[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 103 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (3 children)

'Billionaires bodies are filled with candy and they want you to retrieve it by any means necessary': the new conspiracy coming to life online.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Is it true that when you chop off a billionaires head, two more grow in its place?

[–] Goldmage263@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Not quite. They do die, but they will form a new head and body in hell before coming back to cause more suffering. The more suffering their corporation causes, the faster they regenerate.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 11 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–] WaxedWookie@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago (2 children)

The best kind... You know the kind you like but way, way way better - it's an absolute must-try.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Mmmmmm, I love free and extremely delicious candy.

[–] WaxedWookie@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago

It's yours for the taking!

[–] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

What if it's that weird salty swedish candy though?

[–] WaxedWookie@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Nothing to worry about - you'll love it!

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Thats the thing. No one knows.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I love surprises, I hope I get the following:

-Salty Balls
-Gummy Skulls
-Jelly Brains
-Candied Intestine
-Twix-Fingers

Edit: Formatting

[–] Moobythegoldensock@lemm.ee 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You have to crack ‘em open to find out.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 3 points 2 years ago

What should I use?

A large stick?
A baseball bat?
A night watchman mace?
A Double Headed War Hammer XL?
Skull Flail?
A fancy pimp cane?

Gotta have the right tool to get that candy.

[–] Kase@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Omg a piñata?? And it's not even my birthday!