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this post was submitted on 22 Jul 2023
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From the makers of Cocaine Bear and Sharknado
In a world where sharks are already terrifying,
one drug lord decided to make them even worse.
[Cut to a shot of a drug cartel dumping a shipment of cocaine into the ocean.]
The cocaine is eaten by a school of sharks,
[Cut to a shot of the sharks swimming through the ocean, their bodies glowing with cocaine.]
and they become addicted.
[Cut to a shot of the sharks attacking a boat, their teeth dripping with blood.]
BWAAAAAA
Now, these bloodthirsty sharks are on the loose,
[Cut to a shot of the sharks swimming up the Hudson River, their fins cutting through the water.]
and they're looking for their next fix.
[Cut to a shot of the sharks attacking a group of people on a pier, their jaws snapping shut.]
BWAAAAAA
There's only one thing that can stop them:
[Cut to a shot of a team of shark hunters getting ready to board a boat.]
a team of elite shark hunters.
[Cut to a shot of the shark hunters fighting off the sharks, their guns blazing.]
BWAAAAAA
But even they may not be enough to save the world
[Cut to a shot of the sharks swimming towards the Statue of Liberty, their fins cutting through the water.]
from these COCAINE SHARKS.
[Cut to a shot of the sharks jumping out of the water and crashing into the Statue of Liberty, knocking it over.]
BWAAAAAA
BWAAAAAA
BWAAAAAA
Coming soon to a theater near you.
Rated R.