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PTSD/CPTSD non military
(lemmy.world)
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Not diagnosed, but I'm pretty sure I've fought it a time or three. Maybe still fighting?
One Christmas Eve a couple of dudes barged in the house and took me at knifepoint, stole a thing. My roommate was much older, could have shot them, deemed it not worth the violence. Yeah, I was nuts about always having a knife on me, practiced for years until that wore off.
Couple of years ago a black bear wandered in the dog door. Wasn't here, a young friend was watching the house, and it made for a hilarious story. And then it sank in. Anything and anyone could come in that door. LOL, neighbor's wolf hybrid crept in one night and I pulled gun on him. "BRO! You cannot creep like that!"
Still, after the bear thing, I was paranoid about my pig getting attacked, or me. I stashed guns within reach everywhere in the house. Went kinda nuts for a year or so.
There's been other things in life, but suffice to say, you don't have to go through combat to get fucked into a weird headspace.
FFS, since Trump took over in 2016, and especially since the events of 2020, I've been a nutcase. I have a Colt .45 on my desk, 24/7. I have either a 12-gauge pump or an AR-15 by the bed, with lights and sights. And I practice. I'm under zero illusions that owning a gun makes anyone a badass.
But at this point in history, I can see a few of my neighbors turning into Brownshirts, going door to door, collecting guns, loading trains, "for my own good". (They all know I'm liberal as fuck.)
I have a couple of acres of swamp in Nowhere. Didn't buy it for a SHTF kinda place, but it is now. I'm close to being the prepper that we all made fun of in the 80s.
And yes, I remember the narrative. PTSD wasn't a thing until recently. And civilians certainly weren't recognized as sufferers. I get you.