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As conservatives put religion in schools, Satanists want in, too
(www.nbcnews.com)
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this post was submitted on 16 May 2024
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Satanists basically believe in the same god as christians do right? That means they cant argue that "uhh your religion isnt right its mine that actually correct" because its basically the same religion you just choose satan instead of the "good ones". Please correct me if im wrong, i dont know a lot about religion.
Eh, sure you have your fringe people but most "satanists" are atheists who are exposing how religious conservatives are breaking the separation between Church and State.
If they can put Bible reading or the 10 commandments in schools or public office, then Baphomet and "satan" fun reading time should be allowed as well.
It's the Flying Spaghetti Monster gag (ramen!) but in a package designed to rub conservative Christians extra hard. It's all very cheeky.
Do you think that stopped the wars between Christianity, Islam, and Judaism? Or even the beef between Catholics and Protestants? They will hate you merely because the Sun sets.
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!”
He said, “Nobody loves me.”
I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”
He said, “Yes.”
I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?”
He said, “A Christian.”
I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?”
He said, “Protestant.”
I said, “Me, too! What franchise?”
He said, “Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.”
I said, “Die, heretic!” And I pushed him over.
-Emo Phillips
True true
Theistic Satanists
These would be the (mostly imaginary) ones that conservative Christians are fearmongering about. They'd believe the actual devil exists and that by serving him, they could gain something.
Atheistic Satanists
The kind that is pulling this stunt to fight for religious freedom. Specifically, The Satanic Temple. Their "commandments" are secular compassion, empathy and justice.
Amusingly, the biblical Satan seemed to value many of those things. Freedom ("non serviam" / "I will not serve"), Reason (apple from tree of knowledge in paradise), and perhaps Self Reliance and Equality (in some variants of the creation myth, Adam has a divorced first wive named Lilith who gave him the middle finger when he pulled that alpha male malarkey)
Btw with christian logic why wouldnt you serve satan? If you get shit from him then hes basically better than god because he only gives people natural disasters and suffering.
That really depends on the specific Satanists you're talking about. A few sects aren't even theistic at all. I mix them up sometimes, but I think TST was one of the humanist non-supernationalistic ones.