this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2025
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The Onion

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The Onion

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[–] Nusm@yall.theatl.social 66 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I can’t tell anymore what’s true and what’s parody.

[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Satire is meaningless when reality is far more absurd than anything a writer could ever come up with.

[–] Regna@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

We all said that eight years ago as well. Somehow it’s gotten even worse this time around.

[–] orbitz@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 days ago

I recall that sentiment during the Tangerine Turd's first term as well from comedy writers. Like how can you make satire when it's probably been discussed at the oval office? That alone should make any citizen think about what brought on that situation, but if it didn't the first time, sure as hell won't do anything for the believers now. Unfortunately it makes for a poor situation when it happens to the country with the biggest military on the planet.

[–] MisterOwl@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

Actually genuinely surprised to see this was an Onion story.

[–] Rivalarrival@lemmy.today 39 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I swallowed that fucker whole, but I'm about 92% sure that within 4 years, this headline will have become reality.

[–] S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

At this point is an oracle rather than a comical publication. I remember some years ago they said we gonna deplete our Miley Cyrus reserves.

[–] tacosplease@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Damn. Just learned it was fake from you, my friend.

[–] orbitz@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 days ago

I give it a year, but I'm usually wrong heh. Tiny snowflakes that are richer than anyone. You'd think being that rich you could learn to laugh it off, or at least afford therapy that teaches you that skill, even if it takes a billion dollars cause you're such a huge dick.

[–] Blackout@fedia.io 43 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago

"I liked it so much, I bought the company!"

[–] ebolapie@lemmy.world 19 points 2 days ago

almost ate the onion here

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 12 points 2 days ago

Hair plugs are gender-affirming care.

[–] KingPorkChop@lemmy.ca 28 points 2 days ago (2 children)
[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

Nice to see he was able to rehire his hair back.

[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Omg before his ass hair transplant

[–] amldvk@lemm.ee 35 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Just eating onions this week..

[–] RamblingPanda@lemmynsfw.com 6 points 2 days ago

So crunchy and juicy.

But I've gotten suspicious as well. I check every community before I trust the headline.

[–] _cryptagion@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 days ago

It's getting harder and harder to tell without looking at the comm which stories are Onions or not.

[–] buddascrayon@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The fact that I had to double check and make sure that this is actually an Onion article and not something real bespeaks what a fucked up world we live in now.

[–] 1984@lemmy.today 1 points 2 days ago

I thought it was real and it didnt surprise me. Guess my view of America has changed a lot lately.

[–] KingPorkChop@lemmy.ca 15 points 2 days ago
[–] Nemean_lion@lemmy.ca 15 points 2 days ago

I can already see her standing behind the podium with a grey uniform on.

[–] Wiz@midwest.social 11 points 2 days ago

I just about got Onioned there.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 4 points 2 days ago
[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

Musk is eventually going under the bus. Has no one studied history?! This dumbass is being set up as a patsy. Hell, Trump's already backed up the truck, "Uh, he's not really in charge, uh, it's not his fault."

Tomorrow, it will be his fault. Musk is going down hard when shit truly gets wild. Wait and see.

[–] Sunshine@lemmy.ca 7 points 2 days ago

It’s like getting fined by the court for calling Meloni short.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

Apparently Trump has merged the standards for spokesmodel and Attorney General now. Was there a swimsuit competition?

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

"Yes, Mr. President, we can designate putting too much vermouth in a martini as Domestic Terrorism, and this will give us an excuse to arrest people without a warrant and send them to Gitmo indefinitely without a court order."

"Do it."