this post was submitted on 20 Apr 2025
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Relationship Advice

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cross-posted from: https://thelemmy.club/post/25445395

My dad literally hits me and punishes me by starving me. However, my friend says he’s “just trying to shape me into the perfect young man” and that he “truly loves me”. This almost makes me think she’s either my dad in secret or dating my dad.

In all seriousness, what do I do? Stop talking to her? Talk to her? Be her friend despite it?

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[–] David_Eight@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)
  1. You should probably talk to an adult about what you're Dad is doing or if you're old enough start planning on how you're going to leave the house to get away from him.
  2. Sounds like your friend is just gaslighting you for some reason. You could talk to them and explain why your dad's behavior is wrong but, honestly that would probably be a waste of time. I'd personally just move on and stop talking to them.
  3. Sorry you have to deal with this. You dodn't deserve this.
[–] hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

I'd say ignore your friend's opinion, she isn't your main concern. Talk to someone and get help. An adult, relative, friend... Or call one of the phone help lines, maybe a trustworthy teacher. I think any of that would maybe have a chance to change the situation. And seems this already starts to drag down on your relationships with other people. So you might want to do it.

So if you have someone in your life who sides with you, start with them and talk about your situation and how you feel. Otherwise... I'm not sure how legit they are, but there is https://www.childhelphotline.org/ if you're in the USA. You could ask them what to do if you feel your upbringing is bordering on abuse.