I had to put off this episode to watch it fresh with my partner, so Sunday was a bit of a spoiler minefield. I'd heard about the Billie Piper rumour, and of course that was confirmed to me by some rando who couldn't be arsed using content warnings on Mastodon before I could watch the finale.
Nevertheless, I went into it with an open mind and two expectations only: 1. To be fairly entertained for an hour, and 2. That the Susan plot would get tied up somehow. At least one of those happened!
There were more emotional payoffs here than actually narrative ones — this is not my favourite finale mode for Doctor Who, but I come prepared with plenty suspension of disbelief. It was lovely seeing Anita again, for starters. Was it mainly as a deus ex machina? Sure, but someone had to save the Doctor off that balcony.
The (definite article) Rani continues to chew up the scenery deliciously. It was no problem finding the Doctor, "I just had to look for a blonde human". Well, we have two more of those popping up unexpectedly before the show is over!
It made sense that focus shifted from the "unholy trinity" after that, because how could they live up to the threat they'd been set up as. So the larger fish eats the smaller one, and a third just swims away.
I do have a feeling that Davies doesn't do rewrites except to up the tempo so nobody notices the weaknesses while the story flashes by. Omega is a giant handpuppet, quick! Defeat him so we can get to the baby story! Without the cosmic context, Conrad's story ended as it reasonably should —with a firm talking to, and Ruby wishing him happiness. Off you pop, gammon boy.
As adorable as Sienna-Robyn Mavanga-Phipps is, I did have trouble following the Poppy story. She's the Doctor's and Belinda's wish child, got it. But when Conrad's spell is lifted, they still love her as their own ...okay? And then she's gone and they don't, but Ruby (who last episode insisted Poppy wasn't their child) has to set them straight. Again, it comes down to speed of delivery and suspension of disbelief, otherwise this comes apart before your eyes.
By then we pretty much know what's going to happen. Ncuti Gatwa is definitely off, and this is going to be his last hurrah. It's one of those emotional signals that Davies actually does well, even when the story context doesn't have the same impact. And then —
I swear I clapped and whooped when Jodie Whittaker entered the TARDIS. What a treat of a moment, to have those two paired up!
And finally, a sitdown with Belinda in a new timeline where she's now (and somehow always was) happily Poppy's mum and the Doctor can wash his hands of paternity. That was convenient, but again: It primarily plays on an emotional level to give Belinda and 15 their farewell.
And finally, finally — the Piper moment. What the hell? I'm sort of glad I had this spoiled, because otherwise I might have been really upset that we get another gimmick regeneration as the show goes on hiatus.
I'll be honest, I'm not a Rose Tyler fan. We've been rewatching the 2005 show recently, and I was low key thrilled to see her go after series 2. But this probably, hopefully, won't be Rose again, and Piper is a good actor in other roles; nor, I note, is she credited here as the Doctor.
All in all, this episode was a ripping emotional yarn while it was playing, but once all the moving parts settle down you sort of see they weren't connected in any satisfactory way. Why were we expected to care about Poppy again? Why was Susan setup for a no-show? What in the ever loving hell was the point of having Omega in there?
It's especially a letdown after such a great season where Sethu, Gatwa, and Panjabi really shone. The Doctor may not like endings, which is good because Russell Davies kind of sucks at writing them. Particularly in season finales he tends to overwhelm the viewer rather than actually tie up the story. It's event upon event upon event without resolution, and this is a shining example of when it doesn't work.
So we as viewers go into an uncertain couple of years on the bum note of an amazing lead actor who never really got to flex his skills, the Doctor's first companion who may now never have a chance to return, and an absolutely ridiculous cliffhanger.
As the Rani said in the beginning of "Wish world":
"Hoot hoot, quack quack. Bye bye!"