this post was submitted on 08 Jun 2025
534 points (94.8% liked)

Autism

7853 readers
700 users here now

A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

Community:

Values

  • Acceptance
  • Openness
  • Understanding
  • Equality
  • Reciprocity
  • Mutuality
  • Love

Rules

  1. No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
  2. Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
  3. Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
  4. Do not request donations.
  5. Be respectful in discussions.
  6. Do not post misinformation.
  7. Mark NSFW content accordingly.
  8. Do not promote Autism Speaks.
  9. General Lemmy World rules.

Encouraged

  1. Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
  2. Funny memes.
  3. Respectful venting.
  4. Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
  5. Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
  6. Questions regarding autism.
  7. Questions on confusing situations.
  8. Seeking and sharing support.
  9. Engagement in our community's values.
  10. Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
  11. Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room
  • We have a chat room! Want to engage in dialogue? Come join us at the community's Matrix Chat.

.

Helpful Resources

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 36 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Zenith@lemm.ee 1 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

A lot of them do once they know you’re autistic and what accommodations you need. They’re NT, not psychic

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 points 9 hours ago

And if they were psychic, they wouldn't be neurotypical.

[–] RecursiveParadox@lemmy.world 23 points 20 hours ago (2 children)

I kinda fell like Gen Z gets this right, or more right more often than the others. My Gen Z son is autistic (super high functioning, until the crash comes and he's out for a day or more).

But his friends all understand, and many of them, although NT, identify with some of the experiences atypical people have. And I've seen this with his friends in the States as well. Nobody gives him shit, everyone is accommodating without making a big deal out of it.

Just seems like Gen Z will get this one right, like they have many things. Older Gen Xer posting, just for reference. Like a lot of things, Xers just didn't know better until someone showed us.

[–] Zenith@lemm.ee 2 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago)

I think that’s because they’re actually aware of it. Most older people actually have no idea what autism is or means. So many people think autism means non functional, can’t speak, can’t do anything independently when in reality so many autistic people are literally just normal ass people in nearly every way. So if you think autism looks one way you never realize you need to make accommodations for all the people who experience autism in a different way, you never even realize they have autism and need accommodations to begin with. Unless you tell someone you’re autistic and what accommodations you need they can’t know

[–] cynar@lemmy.world 16 points 18 hours ago

It took a few decades, but the dam seems to be breaking well. Mental health is now no more taboo than physical health (at least for the newer generations, in many places). Accommodating your autistic friend, when they burn out a bit, is no more of an issue than accommodating your friend with a busted knee, or the one working on their weight.

Watching the younger generations roll with what would be horrifying to older generations makes me feel better about the future.

[–] chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world 33 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

They’re not more adaptable to change. They’re frequently baffled by us. They don’t get why we can have very deep and very specific interests in things, for example.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 2 points 11 hours ago

I think it boils down to a lack of understanding due to them never having to put effort into things like socializing

[–] Australis13@fedia.io 82 points 1 day ago (1 children)

To state the obvious: predominantly because they are unaware that their experience of the world is not universal, but in some cases simply because it inconveniences them.

[–] saimen@feddit.org 20 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

But that's what bugs me a bit. Doesn't everyone experience the world in their own unique way and doesn't everyone have to adapt their unique self to society's norms to some degree?

[–] Australis13@fedia.io 12 points 21 hours ago

That's true, yes, but I suspect the variation across NTs is not as wide as the gap between NTs and neurodivergents.

As an analogy, everybody's colour vision is slightly different. But most people are similar enough that they agree on colour, whereas somebody who is colour blind has a distinctly different experience. Most people don't even think twice that what they are seeing is not what another person might be seeing (and without special software it's basically impossible for people with regular vision to gain an understanding of what a colourblind person might see, whilst a colourblind person can only get an idea of what regular colour vision looks like if they have the right colourblindness profile for a pair specialised filtering glasses to work).

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 17 points 22 hours ago

For some people it is easier and for some people they view it as a "I had to do it so you should too."

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 26 points 1 day ago (3 children)

This false binary is the problem. Everyone is on a spectrum of neuro-diversity. Some people's diversity is deemed "unacceptable" arbitrarily.

[–] theblips@lemm.ee 4 points 15 hours ago

Not true. This is why I dislike the "neurodiversity" trend. Just say autistic, ADHD, OCD, etc as they are without trying to link them with an umbrella term, it leads to the false idea that they are not disabilities/illnesses and even that everyone has something. Most people are neurotypical

[–] wpb@lemmy.world 1 points 11 hours ago

Exactly! Goes for other conditions as well. One symptom of having a broken arm is sucking at tennis. I suck at tennis, so in a way, my arm is a little broken. And I can't see what's behind me, so I'm essentially 50% blind.

[–] SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz 22 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) (1 children)

"Everyone's a little autistic!"

[–] Twinklebreeze@lemmy.world 14 points 23 hours ago

Everyone I know, but that's selection bias.

[–] DarkDarkHouse@lemmy.sdf.org 13 points 1 day ago

When you're 6'4" and trying to fit in a plane seat. Like that, but with everything.

[–] danekrae@lemmy.world 16 points 1 day ago (5 children)

What sort of accommodations would you like?

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 3 points 11 hours ago

An instruction manual for life

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 28 points 22 hours ago* (last edited 22 hours ago)
  • not having bright as hell lights and loud music everywhere
  • not being stared at like a fucking zoo animal or some kind of spectacle when I go out in public
  • not being told to "get out of my comfort zone" when that 'cOmFoRt ZoNe' is actually my "not in physical or mental pain-zone"
  • people not throwing the r-slur around like it has no history or meaning behind it at all
  • not being expected to be up and about so fucking early
  • not being treated like I'm either some innate genius or completely brainless

Just people not being inconsiderate, ableist pieces of shit in general.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world 20 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Neurotypicals often feel like they're not being listened to if a person doesn't make eye-contact. I sympathise with their anxiety, but I would like them to understand that if I am forcing myself to make eye contact (or to appear like I am), that takes me so much focus that I'm less likely to be following what they're saying.

This one is more of an ADHD thing for me, but a similar one is that I would like them to understand that if I am fiddling with something with my hands, this is actually an indicator that I am listening to them (for me, tasks like crochet, embroidery or origami are things that I do to occupy my hands and the part of my brain that gets distracted).

Those are a couple of examples, but more broadly, I'd just like for neurotypical people to understand that their experiences aren't universal. Furthermore, I believe that clinging to a sense of normality is harmful because of how it flattens the variety of human experience — even if we're comparing neurotypicals to neurotypicals: "Normal" is a box that I have caused myself severe harm trying to fit in, but I see that same kind of harm being caused to neurotypicals who can contort themselves enough to force themselves into the box. Just because someone can fit in doesn't mean they will be comfortable or happy in that mould — it sometimes makes me glad that I'm autistic, because I get to explore who I am beyond that box of prescriptive normality.

[–] Nythos@sh.itjust.works 9 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Neurotypicals often feel like they're not being listened to if a person doesn't make eye-contact.

I’ve gave up with even trying this anymore, if they feel it’s rude then they can deal with me asking to repeat themselves which they never want to.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world 2 points 13 hours ago

That's the approach I tend to take nowadays too. I sometimes get some flack for it, but I'm not going to set myself on fire to keep others warm; burnout almost killed me, so allowing myself space to be autistic isn't just self care — it's survival

[–] fakeman_pretendname@feddit.uk 29 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Someone could proof-read and edit forms so all the questions can be answered truthfully and they are possible to fill in.

[–] DarkDarkHouse@lemmy.sdf.org 20 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Yes, can the single-selection multiple choices please be mutually exclusive, thank you for your attention to this matter

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 10 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

I was watching something from dropout tv, and someone at one point was put on the spot, got overwhelmed, and said “nobody observe me,” which has stuck with me. I wish there were some signal you could display in public to not receive attention from people. Nothing will tip me from overstimulated to tears or tears to blubbering faster than people asking me if I’m okay. I totally get that when people see an adult woman on the verge of tears in public, they want to do something about it if they can, but I wish they wouldn’t.

[–] Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Do you remember what what show and episode this was?

I feel this so much. Just leave me alone until I can calm myself down enough to function like normal. But no, clearly when I was screaming at my parents to just leave me alone, that was, for some reason, the exact opposite of what they thought they need to do.

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

I believe it was a more recent (last 2-3 seasons) episode of either game changer or make some noise, but I don’t remember much else that’s useful. I know it was a woman/femme comedian, and think it was either Vic Michaelis, Izzy Roland, Erika Ishii, or a one-time/infrequent contestant for either of those shows.

[–] Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 16 hours ago

Oh! Ok cool. I'm waiting to to watch the newest season of game changer with my partner. thanks for the info.