this post was submitted on 16 Aug 2025
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Science Memes

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top 23 comments
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[–] SlartyBartFast@sh.itjust.works 33 points 1 month ago

Sounds euphemistic

[–] Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm very upset the randomized control didn't involve fake shells.

Participants received either intervention of shankh blowing or a sham procedure (deep breathing exercise) for 6 months.

[–] thejml@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 month ago

man, I can only do deep breathing for a few minutes before I start getting light headed. I cant imagine doing it for 6 straight months!

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Conflict of interest: All authors have confirmed that they have no conflicts of interest to declare.

BELIEVABLE (≖_≖ )

[–] corvi@lemmy.zip 25 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Who would benefit here, big Conch?

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That’s my suspicion. Seems rather convenient they suddenly cure human apnea when we’ve been refusing their request to issue everyone a personal conch for years. Clearly they’re trying to find a way to whisper something to the world, we can only speculate on what.

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't know what's wrong with y'all, I've had my conch since childhood.

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 2 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

And what does it whisper to you?

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 2 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

It makes nary a sound without my input, so far as I can tell.

[–] reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net 1 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

Then unfortunately it’s already gotten to you ˙◠˙

[–] Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 2 points 4 weeks ago

You may have gotten your conch recently. I was born with, and shaped by The Conch!

[–] thevoidzero@lemmy.world 1 points 4 weeks ago

Honestly, there's a lot of increasing religious things going on around the world, and some people claiming their religion did things better than science and we should go back to that. So there are definitely people that'll benefit from these things if this is funded by them.

[–] waterSticksToMyBalls@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

A conch wrote this.

[–] dylanmorgan@slrpnk.net 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That will definitely go over well with my neighbors

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Didgeridoo works as well, not sure which would be better

[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Your neighbors would probably prefer that you didgeridon't.

[–] PrimeMinisterKeyes@leminal.space 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Fine, I didgeriwon't then.

[–] Adalast@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

I prefer the didgeridoo.

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Okay, but what do I get out of it?

[–] ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 7 points 1 month ago

If you do it right, I think it summons a Kaiju.

[–] pigup@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Apnoea? Apnoeautiful

[–] olafurp@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Sounds like somebody is tooting their own horn