this post was submitted on 28 Sep 2025
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[–] stingpie@lemmy.world 49 points 5 days ago (1 children)

"Yes, okay, my name is... kllllaaaarrrrrg... i-ifer. Klargifer Caltrop."

"Klargifer is a strange name for a halfling."

"Yuh- yeah. Yeeesss. I suppose it is. That's why I hate my parents."

"Yeah? And what are their names?"

[Suddenly, a wizard or something appears and casts silence on everyone. So you can't ask that the question anymore]

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 16 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Wingus and Mingus Caltrop. They hated their names and parents too. It's a family tradition.

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 12 points 5 days ago (1 children)

John and Sara Caltrop just wanted their son Wingus to have a unique name, unlike their entirely common names

^john^ ^and^ ^sara^ ^are^ ^uncommon^ ^for^ ^halflings.^ ^they^ ^were^ ^just^ ^mean^

[–] Dettweiler42@lemmy.dbzer0.com 46 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Have the npc panic and accuse them of being a fae, screaming and running away. If it happens in a populated area, guards show up and start asking questions. Hopefully the sheet inconvenience will deter them in the future.

[–] sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz 26 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

the one group I was defacto DM for my players would do this knowing the more off guard they caught me the more likely somebody was likely to be called Chungus or Squinton or some shit

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 9 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Chungus? you related to Big Chungus over in Nathlee city?

[–] entropicdrift@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 4 days ago

Nah, he's part of the Bungus clan, I'm clan Chonker

[–] Caveman@piefed.social 27 points 5 days ago (1 children)

That's why I keep a name list and just cross them out as needed.

[–] sirblastalot@ttrpg.network 23 points 5 days ago

protip: don't cross them off, write who they are on the list (eg "Rivermeadow blacksmith") so you can remember when the players come back to them a million sessions later

[–] Boxscape@lemmy.sdf.org 26 points 5 days ago

Falamshar the Kalashtar

Falashnikov the Kalashnikov.

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 17 points 5 days ago

One of my favorite things is giving fantastic creatures ordinary human names. My group will never forget Walter the minotaur who did absolutely nothing interesting aside from being named Walter.

[–] pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip 16 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

I love how the party gravitated and dragged "Wheel Well" along, in Dimension 20: Skyward Ho.

DM Brennan is rarely caught off guard, but Maxwell's younger brother being named "wheel well" felt like an improv moment.

The way the party made sure to drag "wheel well" with them as long as possible - forcing Brennan to keep saying "wheel well" - is just adorable.

[–] supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz 17 points 5 days ago

Just pull a Slartibartfast and get really sad about how much your name sucks and then try to make the players feel bad about it.

[–] CeruleanRuin 11 points 4 days ago

His name is... Jizzmop Pintglass. Hey, you asked.

[–] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 15 points 5 days ago (1 children)

This is how my campaign ended up with Grond the ogre and Fëanor the magic item craftsman.

[–] Rexxiter@lemmy.world 14 points 5 days ago

And how mine has Kevin, Kevyn, Keven, Kyvyn, etc. A a family of gnomes (all pronounced Kevin) that are traveling merchants and blame not remembering an incident by saying it was a different Kevin.

[–] hzl@piefed.blahaj.zone 3 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (2 children)

Homelander memes: helping the internet make fascists feel normal and relatable since 2024 or whenever.

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The boys creators: "make sure you make him really stupidly evil, so there's no confusion about how evil he is"

Conservatives: "damn this guy's kinda cool actually"

[–] hzl@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 3 days ago

Because the internet has a thing for identifying with assholes. Look at Rick Sanchez or Dennis Renolds or Starship Troopers or Warhammer 40K or Helldivers. Take any character or group that's explicitly coded as terrible in the source material, hand it to the Internet, and they'll start making memes about it and eventually unironically decide that character is legitimately great actually. And the people spamming the shit everywhere will always act as though such a thing could never happen.

Meanwhile in the US...

[–] Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Yes, the psychopathic baby eating lunatic definitely makes fascists feel normal and relatable...

[–] hzl@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

No, it makes fence-sitters feel like there's something to identify with in a baby eating lunatic and slowly shifts the Overton window further and further toward normalizing straight up evil.

[–] Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)