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Laittakaa meemejä tänne.
As a former waiter, I have a counterpoint:
Thus, you've created work for me.
Thankfully I haven't been a waiter in - oh look! - 30 years.
Plus if you hand me a messy stack, I now have to leave the table with it. If I can arrange food waste and cutlery on my own, I can carry way more
But I put the cutlery up top, so it's not wobbly at all.
Wait do people really just stack them with all the cutlery scattered throughout the tower?
Yes they do. Some people are that stupid.
My wife used to wait tables and we generally eat or box everything, so I'm pretty confident she's right to pre-bus (and even wipe the table a little while waiting for check).
My only personal analogy is bagging groceries; self service shows how typical people have no idea, while an experienced bagger does. I saw a guy literally put eggs in the bottom of their bag. I can't imagine how terrible their pre-bussing must be.
Yeah, I originally thought I was being nice until I heard this exact sentiment from another server. I try not to make a ridiculous mess and tip at least 20% for good service
I'm a former chef, so I've seen what happens when these best intentions go poorly.
Stack neatly and in manageable heights. If you leave utensils and food between the plates: you're not helping. Scrape remnants on to one plate and leave it at the top of the stack with the utensils.
Also, tip well. At least until we get the radical changes in labor law that would prevent these ratfucking cokehead "Chef"-Owners from paying the dirt wages that makes people live and die by their tips.
Yep instead I pass things out of reach, look the waiter in the eyes, comment on how hard they're working and chat to them. Just treat them like they're human
Well luckily for you I have restaurant industry experience, so I already know how to stack them the right way.
If you leave your cart in a parking space, you're sub-human
You're passible if you take it to the corral
But a truly good human will stack the carts into proper rows if the carts are loose in the corral
I firmly believe in the validity of the Shopping Cart Test. On a related and depressing note, my little city is overrun with errant shopping carts.
I have a clip from my dashcam floating around somewhere of me stopping, jumping out of my car, then hauling ass to catch someone's runaway cart moments before it hit a parked car. Honestly one of my proudest moments.
On the opposite end, I once left a cart (on a curb) and it haunted me. To be fair, it was absolutely storming outside and I was chilled to the bone and just wanted to warm up..
Apparently I'm a truly good human because my organizational autism trait gets triggered. I'm not even annoyed fixing them. It's just satisfying to see them in order.
I do have some caveats for this. As my parents both park in handicap, we've noticed that the cart corrals are super far from the handicap spots and I won't blame someone who already has trouble walking half way down the parking aisle to a corral.
I do tend to take the random carts from the parking lot in to use for shopping when I see them though. No reason to take one of the ones already brought back.
This comment section is a nice mix of "I'm a waiter, please don't do this, you're making my job harder" and "I always do this to make the waiters' lives easier"
Checking in at 23 hours - I count one comment to this effect, but even there the caveat is 'but only if you do it wrong'
Waiters have told me to please not stack the dishes because it messes with their carrying technique.
Yes. If you do it incorrectly then there's food on the bottom of the plates now and they can't shuffle it to their preference anymore.
My dad gets legitimately angry when I do this. Boomers are a different breed
I don't think it's an age thing, more of an empathy test. I've been a dishwasher, maybe that's why I tidy up.
Yeah, my boomer uncle told me it was low class after he watched me do it. When I was a waitress at the time. Fuck him and that mentality - I do it to this day and make into 6 figures
That's bizarre to me.
edit: you just unlocked a memory of my mum bollocking me as a kid for doing it. It's so bizarre why?
My dad gets legitimately angry when I do this
I think it has to do with "putting the waiters out of their job". Like, when you do a part of the job for them consistently, the restaurant manager will eventually notice that and realize they can do with a little bit less staff. So they hire fewer waiters, which means potential waiters face a tougher job market.
And for anybody saying "that little bit of support can't make the difference between more and less staff", yes, it can. Consider that a restaurant manager might have already decided to fire a waiter that's a bit less performant (because they struggle to keep up) but decided to keep them anyways, just in case. Now they see that people do a part of the work, and that might just give them the idea that maybe, they could do with fewer waiters, and there's that one lazy guy who can't keep up anyway ...
When I was a server I hated when people stacked their own plates. First off, I found it performative. Secondly it messed with my system. Thirdly it usually produced a 20lb pile of dishes covered in queso, half eaten burritos, and guacamole that was impossible to carry.
Yeah man. I don't stack anything, not because I don't want to help, but I don't want to mess with your system. Waiting isn't as easy as it seems and I absolutely have no idea how to do it, so I don't want to interfere. I prefer to sit awkwardly and pretend that me leaning back as much as I can to make more space is equally helpful.
My wife and I do this, but I've always wondered whether I'm actually helping or just creating a different kind of inconvenience by not organizing them in a beneficial way.
It's helpful! But don't put trash inside the cups - this can be annoying to empty
I thought this to be common courtesy everywhere?
It *can* be seen as rude, depending on the culture. Like, "I did your job for you because you took so long". More often in "high class" settings, like places that need reservations weeks in advance.
But most of the time, people just don't care to assist the waiters and most waiters will appreciate it if you stack the plates. Some may judge you if you do it wrong.
I really never liked tables that did this, in the restaurants I worked we observed oldschool etiquette… as long as someone is still enjoying their meal, we don’t clean up and if you do, I’ll asssume you just lack education.
As long as you don't overstack it. Make a tidy stack that can be carried easily with one hand securely. If you eg put utensils between plates you can cause an accident.
I may tidy up. But I don't stack. I won't even stack at my house, I hate touching the dirty bottom of a plate.
I usually have a pack of gum and I deliberately start a pattern on how I take pieces out. Usually it's from left to right, emptying a full row before I move on to the next.
My test is to offer them gum and see where they pick from. Will they recognize a pattern and continue it? Or will they be oblivious?
Either way, it's not a measure of good or bad. It's just a fun lil test.
Sometimes I just take a bite out of the entire kit kat bar without breaking it up.
My family would get upset if you did that or if the server came by and offered to take the empty plate away. Why yes one of them is named karen. How did you guess?
This and the shopping cart thing share the theme of consuming with less cost to the business owner, but with no actual difference (or making it worse) for the employees. Their boss will use all of their time no matter how much work they do. You aren't saving them work; you're saving the boss' money.
If you decline to go into a business near closing, then you're my kind of people. If you tip highly you're my kind of people. If you order clearly, concisely, and politely you're my kind of people.
But while you're pushing Sisyphus' boulder up the hill, he just has to go find another boulder.
My test is mostly how do they treat my visibly disabled husband. Who also is older than me and looks it. I don't like being treated like I'm his nurse. I understand why they might think daughter so I'm ambivalent towards that. A lot of people are short and snippy with him because he's harder to understand and that gets me upset.
My boomer mother did this. My boomer father was indifferent.
I do this.
For the record, the only things that get stacked are things that are perfectly stackable, I don't put a plate on top of a half-eaten cheese steak or leave utensils in the middle.
What do you do with your shopping cart when you are done? Do you just leave it to fend for itself in the sea of the parking lot? Or do you do the right thing and bring it back inside or to the cart corral.
The REAL REAL sign though? When someone brings a cart from the parking lot into the store to shop with, ultra move.
For the first time, I feel seen.
You'd fail my test if I learn you have tests for people.
Maybe it's just a matter of phrasing, but the idea that I could be kind to our server all night, tip well, generally hit it out of the park, but be disproportionately judged for failing to do this one small thing because it's your personal test? Sets my social anxiety off enough that if I knew that were on your mind I'd probably just say we're not compatible.
Obviously, keep an eye out for shitty people, and don't put up with bad behaviour, but also judge people as people, wholistically.
Just wanted to put in a counter for what a lot of people are saying in here, if you're looking for a "perfect-clone friend" right out the gate then prepare to be lonely as your tests fail... not because they're horrible people, but because they're a different person with different experiences.
The person litters (like @tiramichu@sh.itjust.works suggested)? Probably see's their entire family litter constantly and never gets comments or maybe even once got reprimanded for saying not to litter to an elder. Just ask them not to when they're in your vehicle, take into account their reaction and maybe have a conversation about it? (personal experience, just let me friend know it was lame and he stopped doing it. But now his vehicle is a roaming trashcan so I guess take what you can get)
You can be friends with people who are different or were raised differently than you, it's actually super beneficial! Now if it's a constant argument or it's turned into a negative experience every time and communication isn't working... it might be useful to move on for everyone's sake at that point.
I mean, you could stack your dishes but still be a rapist or murderer.
