this post was submitted on 03 Oct 2025
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[–] eksb@programming.dev 57 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

My strategy is to have been married to the person for at least a decade so expectations are set.

  1. "They're rambling about trains again; good thing I brought my knitting."
  2. "Oh, they brought their knitting, I may as well keep rambling about trains because they are not paying attention."
  3. good food
  4. walk
  5. bed
[–] cows_are_underrated@feddit.org 12 points 1 week ago

This is peak comedy xD

[–] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 47 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Let your date know that you need to leave by 8pm for your wow raid.

[–] toiletobserver@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Leeeeeeeroyyyyyyy jeeeeeeennnnnnnkinnnnns

[–] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Omg he just ran in, stick to the plan, stick to the plan!

[–] xylogx@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Chance of success… 32.33%

Repeating, of course

[–] Modern_medicine_isnt@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (4 children)
[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 26 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Nobody wants to have sex after they are stuffed with their favourite food!

[–] DeuxChevaux@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

Why not? You must be young. As an elder I can tell you from experience that one can have sex more than once; before, during and after dinner if needed.

[–] GenosseFlosse@feddit.org 3 points 1 week ago

Sex really breaks the ice.

[–] jade52@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago

This should be top comment.

[–] SGGeorwell@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago

Floss your teeth and brush throughly before date, relax, the point is to enjoy yourself

[–] snoons@lemmy.ca 25 points 1 week ago

glow in the dark condom

[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Set up a pizza delivery the day before to ensure it shows up at the exact time I want it. Figure out a good movie ahead of time. Order a fresh bottle of lotion off amazon. Do some stretches with my wrists the day of. Light some candles. You know, the basics.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 15 points 1 week ago

Be kind, communicate a lot.

Sounds dumb but if it's meant to be that's all it should take. People make dating these days so complex.

[–] Tracaine@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

I don't go on dates or come up with strategies. I say "Hi" and then they say things back and I respond to that. I place food into my face hole if it's expected of me. I continue this process until "dates" are no longer needed - one way or the other.

[–] MojoMcJojo@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Do something or go somewhere neither of you has been or done before.

If it's enjoyable for both of you, you win. If it's not fun, you get to bond with each other over not liking it.

People naturally bond when experiencing something together for the first time and feel the same way about it. If you feel the opposite about the experience, then you know you are less likely to be compatible.

The most important part is to be honest about how you feel about the experience, and be honest immediately if you don't like it. "This is terrible, right?"

My marriage is the result of several weeks exploring the town. Other dates were not honest about not liking something, and the relationship didn't last. Wife to be felt the same way about places we tried as I did. If it was a terrible experience and we both thought so, it would bring us closer together just as much as a positive one. In fact, the terrible experiences were sometimes the best because we would laugh together about how bad it was. It's like taking a compatibility test.

[–] tiramichu@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 week ago

Something new is good advice.

It's temping to do something familiar to minimise the "risk" of a bad experience, but that's false safety.

It's human nature to get defensive of what we already know we like, and it puts the other person in a difficult position too where they may feel forced to pretend, or to keep their genuine opinion quiet.

Something new puts you both on an even footing, leaving neither disadvantaged, and that's cool. And - as you say - even if it's terrible, at least you can both laugh about it.

[–] Jerb322@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago
[–] Beebabe@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Fast all day. Order take out. Shower before the gluttony to avoid mirror shame. Consume take-out. Collapse into the blanket pile for nap time. Wake up in time for raid at 9 Pm.