this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2024
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[–] Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world 65 points 1 year ago (4 children)

We did this after space travel and programming language.

[–] drail@fedia.io 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It seems like a great way to send ~50% of the babies birthed out in space. Just remove the net, speed it up, and tilt it 90°, then you have a coin flip chance at space babies or crater babies.

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Have you ever read anything so absurd that you just start laughing uncontrollably but it's after midnight and you don't want to wake your spouse so you real quick clamp down to hold it in and then your gut hurts from all the heaving?

[–] drail@fedia.io 2 points 1 year ago

Sometimes it is worth the brief verbal abuse and getting slapped with a pillow by an exhausted SO.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 21 points 1 year ago

This is due to underrepresentation of women in science. Sure we send a phallus to the moon before this.

[–] Gork@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Sometimes scientists think about if they could, not if they should.

[–] Tagger@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think calling the designer of this contraption a scientist is being very kind to him.

I assume it was a him? right?

[–] evidences@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

I just looked it up, it was apparently a husband and wife team that patented it.

[–] nxdefiant@startrek.website 4 points 1 year ago

this one got an ugly laugh out of me, thank you.

[–] drail@fedia.io 45 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I pitched this exact idea to my fiancé a few days ago (and have no clue why it came up). she didn't think it was a good idea, but now I can tell her that it was good enough to patent.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Don't knock the Vomitron until you've tried at least one birth in it

[–] drail@fedia.io 9 points 1 year ago

Helps with pregnancy nausea AND child birth! Just flip the seat direction and you are ready to expectorate whatever you want out!

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Which is good news for her, too, since in this case you can't just build it yourself

[–] drail@fedia.io 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

She and I don't want to make kids, so it isn't immediately applicable anyway. That being said, I am an experimental nuclear and particle physics PhD student, so I am at least 85% sure that I could convince my boss that we need a medium size centrifuge in the lab and make some... adjustments... upon completion.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you really don't want to have kids, sure! This sounds like a good plan

[–] drail@fedia.io 3 points 1 year ago

We (maybe) want kids, she just doesn't want to ever be pregnant, so adoption is our route if anything.

This would be the worst of both worlds: A pregnancy that we don't even get one of the little shits from! She'll have to deal though, science demands that we try it at least once.

[–] imPastaSyndrome@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago

I mean, what about easier poops?

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Does this work for constipation?

[–] Cort@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Not with a net, you'd need something sturdy and not full of holes to catch the turds

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 1 year ago

And you better hope to God that the machine doesn't slow down in such a way that the shit falls back onto you.

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes... A finer net perhaps... 🤔

[–] Hootz@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago

Brown mist, nope.jpg

[–] Prandom_returns@lemm.ee 21 points 1 year ago

...and why aren't we funding this? Effective AND fun!

Bad and naughty babies get delivered in the pregnancy spinner

[–] rustyfish@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Mommy? How was I born?

With about 250 RPMs, Honey.

[–] occhionaut@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Backstory of Furiosa

[–] ShellMonkey@lemmy.socdojo.com 15 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm guessing this was before anyone realized that shaking babies is a bad thing?

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

shaking is not the same as spinning.

[–] Cypher@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

I see a you know how to make Martinis

[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

What about a few Gs on an unformed skull?

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

skulls are really flexible when that young. forceps are used and deform skulls. lots of things do at that point, even “normal” birth. they usually bounce back into pretty good shape.

[–] occhionaut@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

why did "baby badminton" pop into my mind

[–] FuryMaker@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

Zoidberg, what are you doing in here?

Zoidberg: I live here.

[–] 2deck@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Well thank goodness.. there's a net

[–] tourist@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

I want to see a test run with a pillow case and a watermelon