this post was submitted on 26 Mar 2024
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[–] Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world 65 points 2 years ago (4 children)

We did this after space travel and programming language.

[–] drail@fedia.io 24 points 2 years ago (1 children)

It seems like a great way to send ~50% of the babies birthed out in space. Just remove the net, speed it up, and tilt it 90°, then you have a coin flip chance at space babies or crater babies.

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Have you ever read anything so absurd that you just start laughing uncontrollably but it's after midnight and you don't want to wake your spouse so you real quick clamp down to hold it in and then your gut hurts from all the heaving?

[–] drail@fedia.io 2 points 2 years ago

Sometimes it is worth the brief verbal abuse and getting slapped with a pillow by an exhausted SO.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 21 points 2 years ago

This is due to underrepresentation of women in science. Sure we send a phallus to the moon before this.

[–] Gork@lemm.ee 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Sometimes scientists think about if they could, not if they should.

[–] Tagger@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I think calling the designer of this contraption a scientist is being very kind to him.

I assume it was a him? right?

[–] evidences@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

I just looked it up, it was apparently a husband and wife team that patented it.

[–] nxdefiant@startrek.website 4 points 2 years ago

this one got an ugly laugh out of me, thank you.

[–] drail@fedia.io 45 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I pitched this exact idea to my fiancé a few days ago (and have no clue why it came up). she didn't think it was a good idea, but now I can tell her that it was good enough to patent.

[–] Deestan@lemmy.world 22 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Don't knock the Vomitron until you've tried at least one birth in it

[–] drail@fedia.io 9 points 2 years ago

Helps with pregnancy nausea AND child birth! Just flip the seat direction and you are ready to expectorate whatever you want out!

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Which is good news for her, too, since in this case you can't just build it yourself

[–] drail@fedia.io 8 points 2 years ago (2 children)

She and I don't want to make kids, so it isn't immediately applicable anyway. That being said, I am an experimental nuclear and particle physics PhD student, so I am at least 85% sure that I could convince my boss that we need a medium size centrifuge in the lab and make some... adjustments... upon completion.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

If you really don't want to have kids, sure! This sounds like a good plan

[–] drail@fedia.io 3 points 2 years ago

We (maybe) want kids, she just doesn't want to ever be pregnant, so adoption is our route if anything.

This would be the worst of both worlds: A pregnancy that we don't even get one of the little shits from! She'll have to deal though, science demands that we try it at least once.

[–] imPastaSyndrome@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

I mean, what about easier poops?

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 24 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Does this work for constipation?

[–] Cort@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Not with a net, you'd need something sturdy and not full of holes to catch the turds

[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 2 years ago

And you better hope to God that the machine doesn't slow down in such a way that the shit falls back onto you.

[–] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Yes... A finer net perhaps... 🤔

[–] Hootz@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

Brown mist, nope.jpg

[–] Prandom_returns@lemm.ee 21 points 2 years ago

...and why aren't we funding this? Effective AND fun!

Bad and naughty babies get delivered in the pregnancy spinner

[–] rustyfish@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Mommy? How was I born?

With about 250 RPMs, Honey.

[–] occhionaut@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Backstory of Furiosa

[–] ShellMonkey@lemmy.socdojo.com 15 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'm guessing this was before anyone realized that shaking babies is a bad thing?

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 years ago (2 children)

shaking is not the same as spinning.

[–] Cypher@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

I see a you know how to make Martinis

[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

What about a few Gs on an unformed skull?

[–] Willy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

skulls are really flexible when that young. forceps are used and deform skulls. lots of things do at that point, even “normal” birth. they usually bounce back into pretty good shape.

[–] occhionaut@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

why did "baby badminton" pop into my mind

[–] FuryMaker@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago

Zoidberg, what are you doing in here?

Zoidberg: I live here.

[–] 2deck@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

Well thank goodness.. there's a net

[–] tourist@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

I want to see a test run with a pillow case and a watermelon

[–] spankinspinach@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago