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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by blueskiesoc@lemmy.world to c/adhd@lemmy.world

Thank you Nome @NomedaBarbarian

For the visually impaired, the images are a series of Twitter screenshots.

Full transcription of text below images.

Full transcription of text below images.

Full transcription of text below images.

Full transcription of text below images.

@NomedaBarbarian on Twitter:

Thinking about how I've been lied to as an #ADHD person about what habits are.

That apparently is not what neurotypical folks get to experience.

Habits are things that they do without thinking.

They don't have to decide to do them. They don't have to remember to do them. Things just happen, automatically, because they've done them enough for that system to engage and make them automatic.

That system...which I lack.

Every single time I have brushed my teeth, it's been an active choice. I've had to devote thought and attention to it. It's not a routine, it's not a habit, it's something that I know is good to do, and hopefully I can remember to do it.

Every single time I exercise, or floss, or pay my rent, or drink water, or say "bless you" when someone sneezes,

It's because I've had to actively and consciously engage the protocol.

It never gets easier.

Just more familiar.

It's part of my struggle with my weight--exercise never becomes a habit, and every single time I do it, it is exactly as hard as the first time. It takes exactly as much willpower & thought.

I got lied to about how it would just "turn into a habit". And blamed, when it didn't.

Drinking water isn't a habit. Feeding myself isn't a habit. Bathing isn't a habit.

I spend so much more energy, so much more time, so much more labor on just managing to maintain my fucking meat suit.

And now you want me to ALSO do taxes?

ON TIME?

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[-] foo@lemmy.ca 12 points 1 year ago

My worst habit is ignoring all the reminders on my phone... which I set in hope of building habits...🙁

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[-] Hextic@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago
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[-] A_Chilean_Cyborg@feddit.cl 10 points 1 year ago

There are things that I get to become automatic but they're very small

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[-] sequential@lemm.ee 10 points 1 year ago

I'm like this too, as a neurodivergent without ADHD. Everything I do, I do deliberately and thoughtfully, with intense focus. Even driving, I can't go into autopilot mode. It's probably why I need a nap most days...

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[-] d4rknusw1ld@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago

As someone who thinks he has ADHD and not Bipolar is now confused after reading this. I feel like I have habits but I’m like half way in half way out on this. Feel like I’m straddling the fence.

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[-] tomkatt@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

I'm fairly certain I'm ND, but never fully knew if it was Autism (Aspergers?) or ADHD. Mom never followed up on the testing when I was a kid (and neither did I as an adult), but autism runs high in my family, and I have low and high functioning extended family.

Yeah, definitely not ADHD. I have issues, stims, triggers, but I'm functional, and can definitely form habits, and don't necessarily experience the issues noted here.

[-] mykl@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Lol at expecting me to read those when you’ve somehow managed to screenshot them at an angle.

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[-] maegul@lemmy.ml 8 points 1 year ago

So as a NT that is only recently thinking about how ND I might be, what's striking about this to me is that no only do I not have or form any "automatic" habits, but I think my lack of such or my lack of ability to form them has formed a deep aspect of my personality.

Like, I don't want to do anything "automatically", and any kind of environment or culture or expectation that relies on "just doing things automatically" is something I not only dismiss as unappealing and even "bad" but something I even get suspicious about and about the kinds of people that get into that. Like, however productive and helpful it is, I honestly think I've developed an unconscious distrust of people that simply "do things automatically" on the grounds that they're not plugged in enough to values and purposes and the "why this should be done".

Of course, maybe I've got a point there. Though maybe virtue doesn't play a role when it comes to the dishes. My point though is that I'm pretty sure I've incorporated this as a given and allowed it to inform my worldview, so I guess that's fun.

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[-] markovianparallax@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

Wait, what. You are blowing my mind right now.

[-] Lemmylefty@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

I have habits! …sometimes.

No but seriously, I get into what I call “ruts”, be they good or bad, where I’m doing (or not doing something) routinely…for a few days, weeks, even months, and then it all comes crashing down.

It’s like my autistic side is wrestling with my ADHD side: I WANT and NEED things to be the same, but I can’t maintain it, so I just flip flop between what is and isn’t “normal” in the moment, which makes switching back hard.

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this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2023
607 points (88.0% liked)

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