Fuck cruise ships in general

"We deeply regret the lose of any sea life." Plows into whale and keeps going. Conservation? Nailed it! (Literally to the front of your ship.)

When asked for comment, the ship's captain tapped his wooden leg and smiled.

This is the best summary I could come up with:

A cruise ship sailed into a New York City port with a 44-foot dead whale across its bow, marine authorities said.

The whale, identified as an endangered sei whale, was caught on the ship’s bow when it arrived at the Port of Brooklyn on Saturday, National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration fisheries spokesperson Andrea Gomez said.

“We immediately notified the relevant authorities, who are now conducting an examination of the whale,” officials with the cruise line said in a statement.

“We are deeply saddened by the loss of any marine life,” the officials said, adding that the Geneva-based MSC Cruises follows all regulations designed to protect whales, such as altering itineraries in certain regions to avoid hitting the animals.

The dead whale was relocated to Sandy Hook, New Jersey, and towed to shore there to allow for better access to equipment and to conduct a necropsy, Gomez said.

Samples collected from the whale will help biologists determine whether it was already dead when it was struck by the ship, she said.

The original article contains 235 words, the summary contains 170 words. Saved 28%. I'm a bot and I'm open source!