I assumed this one was satire, is that a real tweet?

Notable that their haven't violent protests anywhere zionists and cops weren't involved

Ohhhhh the joke is that she's asking google for instructions?

Yes, we do. The day following the sustainment of head injuries which resulted in the acute loss of consciousness (that is, the day after Nex sustained a severe brain injury) Nex was with their mother preparing to travel for an appointment when their eyes rolled back in their head, they collapsed and were struggling to breathe.

The next day, Benedict called 911 requesting medics for Nex, whose eyes were rolling back and was struggling to breathe. Benedict described how Nex had been dealing with a headache after the fight at the school.

Above quote from Fox23 article Owasso Police release body cam video, 911 call, leading up to student's death following fight in school bathroom
Fox23 News Article
Internet Archive of the same Fox23 News Article

From what I remember when this was a fresher story, Nex died shortly after being sent away from a hospital they were at after sustaining a head injury. The spontaneous death from an untreated brain bleed hours later is now being ruled a suicide?

Yup

Edit: I can't find the video where you can see her being groped but here's an article and the embedded video here shows her blowing her vape into the row in front of her. https://www.denverpost.com/2023/09/12/lauren-boebert-removed-beetlejuice-musical-denver/

Fountain soda costs a few pennies per gallon, the lost earnings of which would ordinarily be counted as small beans compared to the wages saved by reducing the bodies you need to pay to run your restaurant. The pandemic taught companies though that you don't need a body for every job, you need only as many as it takes to keep the door unlocked. The single person whipped and frantic doing the jobs of eight people will just have to work harder and maybe next year they'll get a fifteen cent raise

This is the article?

NORTH TEXAS (CBSNewsTexas.com) — Ken Paxton's impeachment trial hasn't started yet, but there is already political fallout. Not just for the attorney general, but for other Republican leaders and lawmakers as well.

When House members first heard details of the 20 articles of impeachment against Attorney General Paxton, Republican Texas Rep. Charlie Geren of Fort Worth dropped a bombshell:

"I would like to point out that several members of this House while on the floor of the House doing state business, received telephone calls from General Paxton personally threatening them with political consequences in their next election."

The whole article?

You're absolutely right, every citizen who ever makes any decision that makes another unsafe should be immediately executed. Remember this the next time you approach a stopsign, or step outside your home with no mask, or delay buckling your seat belt, or put meat on the top shelf in your fridge. All of these are absolutely damning sins. You are such a righteous and bright light of brilliant justice.

Oh hey, I hadn't heard he's been dealing with cancer. When did that start?

I suffered a traumatic brain injury as a pedestrian who didn't look both ways. My answer isn't very fun but I technically qualify as I had to be resuscitated on scene.

I was in a coma for a few days and then--despite being conscious and over time regaining awareness, then vocalization, then even conversational speech--I wasn't writing any new long term memories for a couple of months. My experience of that dark period, to the extent that it isn't nothing, is pretty vague. The memories of months preceding injury are pretty blurry until the injury which I don't remember and then the next I remember is being tied to a hospital bed and chewing on the Posey mitts. I remember some hallucinating in that period, one instance is an ordinary piece of a day interacting with nurses and therapists but perceiving everything as if drawn in the Family Guy cartoon. I post-hoc interpret that memory as a vague basically dream state that got mashed in with a Family Guy memory.

So no, no afterlife experience or memories of the other side.

Hmmmmmmmm I thought prion diseases were (usually) a result of eating brain matter and occasionally the result of eating non brain matter that shared a body with a brain. By this understanding, the risk of prion diseases wouldn't be a factor as only the misfolded proteins of a brain are ones that can be risky.