That is so demeaning! Fragile? Like what? If you have adhd it can make every day things stressful and difficult and dont evem gdt me atarted on self image. I would definitely get a second opinion. Could be you have it, could be you don't but at least find someone that has more to offer for an explanation than that. It's exhausting and nerve-wracking for sure but don't give up.

That is so frustrating. I'm glad your wife finally got help but that must have been stressful for her. Also a 5 minute assessment is just silly, for anyone it should be longer. Funny how they so easily diagnosis it for men without question. Not trying to discount your diagnosis but just wanted to state the hypocrisy between the two evaluations (yours and your wifes).

Thanks for posting this. Definatly resonates. Makes me sad to think of how many women have lived most of their lives struggling more than they should be because it was thought it just wasn't a thing women had. Barely anybody does studies or research on women,we are just to complicated with our hormones they say. But that is unacceptable. It's getting better slowly, but we still have a long way to go.

I wasnt diagnosed until this year at 44. It had come up as a suspicion when I was doing a search a few years prior to why I was having certain issues but I didn't take it serious. Like many I didn't understand what adhd actually was, just thought it was the stereotypical view most people have. Then a therapist I was seeing for depression this year suggested I get tested. It wasn't easy, first try was very dismissive and rude, I almost just gave up then, the second time went much better, they actually let me talk and got a proper history from me. I am finally getting help for all my problems, adhd included.

I just want to encourage any women out there that are struggling and think maybe this might be a possibility to at least try to get tested. Don't suffer in silence. We need to speak up louder when the world won't listen. I wish you all the best in your journey wherever you are on this path.

I am not one to post much and mostly just lurk sadly. I get a bit stressed out over making comments and posts. I'm just posting right now to say hello and provide my support to this post. I think the ideas people have mentioned are great. Maybe we could start some discussion posts on different topics (adhd related or not, could be women's stuff or anything really) so people can share their experiences.

If I'm not really into what I'm reading the words are just words and I dont really absorb what is being said, if I am interested in what I'm reading however its the opposite and I don't even see words, just knowledge or if its a story I disappear into another world. It's one or the other and I can't force it. I think I must hit some kind of hyperfocus mode when I am able because usually when this happens it's hard to pull myself out of what I'm reading. I need to figure out how to turn that mode on manually. 😆

At 22 you still have most of your life to live. Be glad you found out now and not at 44. Diagnosed this summer and it's good to know, but at the same time all those years of flailing kind of make me sad. All I can do though is move on from here and I hope you can do the same.

Yep, never was able to understand what I should be studying for exams. Always was learning the wrong things and then would be like where did that question come from? Then id try to just make stuff up to answer.

Got to college and it was even worse. They threw stuff on there from lectures that was not in the text book and of course I wasn't paying attention or wasn't even there. 🙄

of course the classes I was fascinated with I didn't have trouble because I could almost recite the material after fixating on it. Wish I could have done that for all my classes. Maybe I'd have a degree right now. would have been nice to know about ADHD back then. Oh well. Such is life.

Thank you for sharing your story! I have known i did not want kids since I was 14. I am 44 now and I don't regret it at all. My mom left me with my sister when she was a baby and I hated it. I didn't hate my sister I just was not and am still not comfortable with babies.I am the opposite as I do not and never did get that oxytocin feeling from babies. I am okay with toddlers and am much better with older kids but babies are a no go for me.

Either way, I can barely look after myself, I don't need to bring another being into this world to suffer along side me. I respect and am happy for the people in my life that have started families but also confident and happy with my choice not too.

I am glad that people are becoming more accepting of peoples choices in this matter as I was really getting tired of the oh you will change your mind when you are older speech. I'm older now, still haven't changed my mind.

Enjoy you pets! They need loving homes too!

I think there are a lot of computer illiterate people I most generations but there seems to be an overlap of late gen x/early millennial thst kind of had to learn how computers and the internet worked if they wanted to use them as tech wasn't as easy to use. Plus anyone older than that who used computers where more often considered nerds.

These days more and more people don't even have a computer and just do everything through their phones.

I don't carry much, wallet, phone in keys. I usually have a jacket or something that has pockets. I also try and pick out pants with the biggest pockets I can find. Which usually fits my wallet and keys and then I just carry my phone. I can't do purses, I'll just accidently leave them places. To risky.

Used weed for the past 20ish years to make my damned brain shut up and for sleep issues. I quit about 4 months ago after the realization that I might have adhd. Wanted to see if things got better after stopping. They really didn't. I had no clue that this could be the source of my issues until recently so now I'm over here waiting for an appointment. Self medication and drug/alcohol use is apparently really common with undiagnosed adhd. But damned do I miss it. The first couple weeks where rough, and i do feel like I was having some withdrawal effects from quitting despite people saying it's not addictive. It was literally giving me easy dopamine so your comment makes alot of sense.

Welcome! I moved to lemmy the Sunday before the blackout and haven't looked back. I did go back finally on June 30 and deleted my account. There may not be as much content now but that will come in time as we all hopefully try and contribute. I was mostly a lurker on reddit myself, only started commenting more within the past year so will try to be better here. I am quite enjoying my time here and I hope you do as well.