[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 1 points 2 days ago

Here is what works for me. If it doesn't for you then that's understandable.

At some point it gets easier to live with less than to work more. Jobs that pay a lot always either:

  • are painfully hard
  • require rare degrees of certification
  • require a lack of morality Many combine several of those items.

Personally I live with way less than what would be considered "low" in my country: it pays for my home, food (as long as I cook myself most of the time) and I am even able to keep some around in case of need. Now with that said I have no idea how it is in your country so my advice are probably off.

8

This is about a test I took as a child, about 20 years ago (not sure if it was IQ, but it was this kind of test). I'd like to find what it was but I (obvioulsy) dont remember everything about it. However some specific details are still pretty vivid so perhaps one of you had a similar test and could have a reference.

I remember a section about assembling jigsaw puzzles. Not very complicated one but I was timed. There were also trivia questions (like "what does the U.N. acronym mean?"). More specifically, there were questions where I was shown pictures and I had to point out "what was missing". Stuff like a chest of drawers (like this one but as a simplified drawing) with one handle missing.

Thanks for your attention!

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 weeks ago

Thank you! I guess I'll still mask anyway because, well, I can't picture myself not masking at all when interacting with a stranger, and even less if my father is present. Also this shouldn't be my last appointment so hopefully I'll have other occasions.

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 weeks ago

Thanks for your account! Mine won't be remote, and I don't have any animal at home (except some spiders but they are too cute to eat my cords).

13
First appointment on Monday (lemmy.autism.place)

So, I am (finally) having the first appointment for my diagnosis. I would be lying if I said I wasn't stressed at all... Any tips?

For context, I'll be with my father (they asked for a parent to come), with whom I have a complicated relationship (no hostility, but still he is stressful to be around).

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 weeks ago

This. Except I'm not limited to authority figures and that's sometimes very hard to handle. Like if a friend wants to invite me on monday but I already have something planned with another friend that same day I sometimes feel like giving the real reason would make them jealous. Yes, I know I shouldn't do this, and I'm working on it, but it's not easy. It's especially hard when the real reason is something like "spending time with you in particular is very stressful for me and I can't handle it".

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 3 weeks ago

The taste of several specific things (cheese that "turned bad", garlic that isn't perfectly fresh), high-pitched sounds, and a few more I don't have in mind.

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 3 weeks ago

A few of those items are only redflags if done in a specific way. For example about "non-reciprocal": if you are in a wheelchair and your partner is arachnophobic, it makes sense that you are the only one who takes care about dealing with spiders while your partner is the only one who helps you move around. I recommend that you start consulting this kind of list only when something starts to "not feel right", otherwise you'll poison all your relations before they even start (because there is no such thing as a perfect relationship). Still I'm no relationship expert, so take my advice for what it's worth.

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 4 points 1 month ago

I have something that may or may not be related: some stuff just makes me physically faint. It's never sudden, I see it coming and if I manage to get away from the trigger, lay down and wait it goes away, but if I can't do it quick enough I know it can be dangerous. Among the triggers are intense pain (like burning your stomach by swallowing something too hot) but also conversations about "real" body horror (a movie is fine, but somebody telling me about how their plan to get an operation often isn't, back in middle school I remember fainting as the teacher was talking about some health risk).

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 4 points 1 month ago

Not speaking for all of them but sometimes just feeling good about yourself is enough. You can even tell them how you appreciate their efforts (assuming you do)

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 months ago

My local roleplaying game club. I'd bet half of them, despite not acknowledging it, are considerably deep on the spectrum. Funny bit: My aesthetic ideals clash with those of one of the guys there: he likes things to be well-ordered in neat piles and I like non-patterns. Doesn't stop us from being good friends.

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 months ago

On the waiting line for a diagnosis (I should call them btw), unemployed despite having diplomas. Those last days I am facing a weird puzzle: I have to get analyzed at the lab, which is open from 7:30 to 11 am, and need to be exactly 12h fasting at that moment, but my daily routine involves a big meal at midnight and skipping it would make me well over the 12h fasting duration (and being hungry isn't very fun as you may know). I think I will manage it somehow but currently that's a bummer.

Better: a gal I like a lot is visiting this weekend and it's going to be great. She is one of the only people with whom I am able not to mask.

Also that's a great season for mushrooms. Got a full basket of chicken of the woods last week and still have some left.

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 2 points 2 months ago

I do care. I totally get how you can be charismatic in school despite being autistic, that is perhaps the biggest misconception. I personally think if I had no morals and just wanted to make money my best bet would be running some kind of cult (but that would be wrong ofc).

[-] maryXann@lemmy.autism.place 4 points 2 months ago

I am a native French speaker who had a phase with an interest toward grammar, so I probably can help you with it if you are learning this language. Also I am quite good at explaining maths to kids or teens, even those with difficulties. It gets harder with adults.

4

I know it would sound stupid for most people, but not here (I hope?)

So I am in my early thirties and I have a long history of not going enough to the doctor. When I was a child my mother was my referent doctor and she always have been in the "no need to take medecine if it's going to heal by itself" school of thinking (I don't mean that in a bad way: I still got my vaccines, etc, just that she would directly send me to specialists when there was a serious issue). After I left the house I never cared about changing my referent doctor (although of course my mom who lived hundreds of kilometers away couldn't fill this role anymore) so I just stopped seeing any health professional.

As it appeared to me more and more obviously that I was autistic, I wanted to get a diagnostic (it is needed here in France if I want to have accomodations at work and such, also I would get some money that wouldn't hurt). Among all of the steps I needed to consult a doctor. I asked some people I know if they knew doctors who would take new patients, looked all over the internet, made way more calls than it was comfortable... but I couldn't find any. The only appointment I could get had a 6 months delay, plus it was with a substitute, and I was so stressed about it that I messed up the date and came the previous day... In the end I managed to get some papers I needed but nothing more.

About a month ago I was feeling a bit sick and I decided it was enough and I needed something to be done. All the doctors were full, as always, or didn't take new patients, but some were noted as on vacation but with a substitute (and said substitute didn't specify if they took new patients or not). Rather than calling to check, I decided to just get the appointment. At worst they would send me a mail to tell me my appointment had been cancelled or whatever. Still it was very stressfull.

Anyway, my appointment went very well and this substitute doctor was very nice. She told me she would open her cabinet next year and would be able to be my refferent at that point, but also that before that she could work as a "temporary refferent" for most stuff. She looks like a great doctor.

That's all! I hope it wasn't too boring to read through my ramblings.

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maryXann

joined 4 months ago