I studied politics, and even then I never wanted to run. I just wanted to be a staffer and work on policy and tactics.

I left politics because I felt I couldn't help people, and inter party politics were not something I was interested in. I went back to school so I could help people more directly as a nurse.

I don't think I'm a great candidate, but I feel like I have to do something. No one is coming to save us, we have to so it ourselves.

Seems a lot harder to get across the ocean than into Canada, but I will take any viable option at this point.

I'm in Minnesota, if you can make it up here I'll take you with me.

It's very difficult, and in the end, it comes down to finding things that work for you, but in my experience, doing it "on my own" is virtually impossible. Humans need social interaction and often help, especially when battling with mental illness. That being said, there are some things that help most people.

1. Exercise - you don't need to run a marathon or lift free weights, but any kind of exercise, including walking, can have a big boost on mental health. If you can, working up a sweat can help release more endorphins (and also helps motivate me to take a shower when I'm struggling with hygiene).

2. Sleep - prioritize getting good sleep. This has a huge effect on your mental health, and lack of sleep makes intrusive thoughts more difficult to ignore. If you suffer from suicidal ideation, this can be very beneficial. It can also help set up a routine for exercise, hygiene, etc. if you have more consistent bed and awake times.

3. Eating healthy- this is hard, because often when depressed we go for unhealthy foods, which make us feel bad, so we eat more of them and it perpetuates the cycle. If you really struggle with this start by making small changes - find a fruit or vegetable you genuinely enjoy and start incorporating more into your diet. Learning some basic cooking skills can also make healthy eating more enjoyable.

4. reduce drug and alcohol use (if any) - these can be excellent short term solutions, but will often make you feel worse in the long run

5. find someone to talk to - online resources help, but there's no substitute for genuine in person (or over the phone) interaction. This can be harder said than done if you're older or in an area where it's hard to meet people. Support groups are also excellent- there's something very empowering about being surrounded by folks experiencing the same challenges you do every day.

6. practice gratitude- take some time every day to thing of things you are genuinely thankful for. Supposedly, the brain can't think or negative things while you are thinking of positive ones. Even if that's not true, taking time to appreciate the good things in your life (even if it's something small like your morning coffee) can help redirect your thought process.

Lastly, understand you can do all the "right" things to battle depression and still be depressed. No amount of exercise or vegetables will suddenly make you better - you will likely still have bad days. That's why, for me, it's important to have people I know I can call and talk to (my brother being a big one right now). We don't even really talk, I just call him and cry talk for a bit and eventually it doesn't hit so hard.

Give yourself some credit for all the bad days you've been through- if you weren't strong, you wouldn't have made it this far. Good luck! I'm rooting for you!

I started with a doctor, but I've basically been DIY for about 2 years now due to a lack of competent providers in my area.

If you can afford it, it's worth getting your blood checked at a place like Quest Diagnostics or any other non-hospital affiliated lab. Look around and compare prices. it should be a few hundred dollars. It's not something to do frequently, but you can at least get an idea of what your levels are. The one caveat is that if you're taking oral medication, it might not even be worth it unless you can time your lab right at the peak dosing time.

You aren't likely to overdo it to the point of safety unless you're taking massive doses. WPATH recommends 100-200 for your E range, but I know girls that are under the care of (less informed) doctors, and I've seen results closer to 1000s without ill effects. It's important to stay active and not smoke to prevent blood clots, but that's about it. It's good to do some weight training to help with bone strength, in case you lose access to your hormones it can help osteoporosis if you have had any testicular atrophy.

The most important thing - of your seeing results you're happy with, keep it up! E can be magic, but I've found a lot of my passing privilege comes from learning how to frame my face and pick clothes that are flattering for my body type.

Voice training is well worth it if your goal is to pass, but it's often one of the most difficult things you can do, especially without a teacher. If you're interested, DM me and I would be happy to help with resources and what not.

Glad to hear some of us are doing well, even without official support. Keep it up!

Estrogen does not dilate blood vessels, and vasodilation won't cause pain. It's very unlikely that the hormone is causing the pain.

I have a few questions, if you don't mind? You said you are doing the injections subcutaneous. Where are you injecting? What length of needle are you using? Subcutaneous injections are relatively painless and shouldn't be causing any of the issues you are describing, but if you're using a needle that is too big or injecting in a bad spot the pain could be related to injection site soreness.

Pain in the legs and below the knee could be a sign of deep vein thrombosis. It's very unlikely, but estrogen can make you more susceptible to blood clots. You are at higher risk for this if you smoke cigarettes (especially if you're over 35), if you have a more sedentary lifestyle, or if your serum estrogen level is too high. Subcutaneous injections tend to lead to higher serum estrogen levels, which can put you at a higher risk for blood clots.

You said you are DIY, is anyone checking your estrogen levels? What dose of estrogen are you taking, and how often?

It's pretty unlikely the pain is from a DVT, but that is a very serious complication you need to rule out (a dislodged clot from a DVT that travels to your lungs can cause a pulmonary embolism, which can potentially be fatal).

I hope this doesn't come across as condescending, but these are the questions I would ask if you were a patient.

It's not as punk, but the last three albums by Metric are brilliant in how they discuss the current state of the world.

Congratulations! You're first visit should be pretty chill. They should talk to you about how long you've felt this way, if you've taken any steps to transition, a health history, and if they're good, they will ask about your support system.

They should go over all the potential risks and effects of feminizing hormone therapy, including what's 'permanent', how long changes take. You should also be open if you smoke/vape - it won't preclude you from taking E, but if you smoke you shouldn't take it orally.

You should have some labs drawn for baseline levels. Usually they check estrogen, testosterone, a complete metabolic panel, a complete blood count, and they should probably do prolactin and a lipid panel (lipid is a fasting panel ideally, but if you're not used to having your blood taken make sure you eat something before the visit).

You can usually start the medications before getting your labs back, unless you have a medical history that warrants waiting, although that's kind of up to the prescriber.

Visits should be every 3 months the first year, then 6 months the second year, and them yearly. You may need slightly more frequent visits if you change the route of your medication, or if you're labs aren't in the goal range.

It's important to look into minority stress and see if they have any resources or groups they can connect you with. Trans folks have higher rates of mental illness - that's not because there is something inherently wrong with us. It's because we live in a society that can be very hostile to us, even in places that are considered progressive. Start working on resilience now, and try not to do it alone. It's a lot.

Finally, my personal recommendation is to look into voice lessons, especially if you are not socially out. Not only is it rewarding to have your voice reflect who you really are, having the space to try out your identity, name, pronouns, presentation, etc. in a safe and affirming space can be just wonderful. It really helped me figure some things out when I wasn't sure exactly where my path would lead.

And, in the ancient wisdom of our people, just remember - you got this.

It's actually a very good strategy to come out to people a little outside your main circle before coming out to the people closest to you. It's like a dry run, and if they aren't accepting, it's not quite as hard as it can be with close friends and family.

It sounds like your mum might have an idea you are somewhere in the lgbtq umbrella, and it sounds like your sisters either won't care or will be supportive.

Coming out to ANYONE is a big deal, and you should be proud of yourself for that. It's a process, it takes time for some of us.

When you think you're ready, figure out one family member you feel is the most likely to be accepting, and go from there.

The only caveat is if you might get kicked out or otherwise cut off financially, if you rely on them. Safety is the #1 priority at all times.

Good luck! You got this 🏳️‍⚧️

I prefer to do this with "Do you believe in life after love". We call it a Cher bomb.

Best part is it's basically a bell curve of how into it people get. Starts off alow, maybe one or two. By the third play, most of the bar is feeling it. And then all downhill from there

Slay the Spire. It's so challenging that it's always engaging when I play it.

I'm right there with you. I'm actively trying not to have sex with anyone and the game makes it hard just to talk to them sometimes, and even then the 'non-horny' option is often borderline horny or could be a double entendre.