What do you mean by normal? The lemmyNSFW instance has plenty of smut, especially if you are a guy you will probably enjoy it. Not as much discussion though, I agree with you on that, I too like the talk about sex and it's not fast moving, no.

If you just mean reasonable people, I have been lucky I guess. Haven't run into too many crazy in any direction.

I think the early adopters of online forums are always going to be sort of geeky, otherwise we wouldn't find or enjoy them. I remember the early Usenet text forums, was on a belly dancing group and like 75% of us were in tech as day jobs. Reddit wasn't always like it is now, either. Probably even Facebook started with the more geeky crowd. I am sort of an outlier in this way, older and I guess a "normie" by most definitions but not tolerant of most social media so do jump earlier.

The !cocktails@lemmy.world is my baby here and slow and steady growth is more manageable, I have had close to zero need to moderate it at all, it has been great. So maybe follow more lifestyle stuff like that, if you want less tech focused discussion.

It all depends on your definition of normie I think. Growth for the sake of growth, no, but we are not quite at the critical mass that keeps it moving fast.